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Wednesday, April 8, 2015

{WW} Heavenly Places

It was late. The hospital lights were dim. Uncle Orlan had so kindly bought us each a hotel room just down the street but our hearts were with dad. We knew he didn’t have much time left. The pain wracking his body made him moan. The pain medication gave him tremors. Two huge cancer lumps had grown in his neck overnight and we were thankful he was not responding anymore.

In the quietness and darkness, Karen sat on one side of dad holding his hand and visiting with Uncle Orlan. Bren sat on the other side of dad, holding his hand and dozing. Softly and quietly dad breathed his last. He lay with his eyes shut, the pain immediately erased from his face.

We stood together, my siblings and I, our spouses close by. It was almost a physical feeling… so close to heavens’ gate we stood, so close we could almost hear the singing, the rejoicing on the other side.

We stooped and kissed his cooling cheeks. We held his hand, though still, now clasped in God’s.
Good-bye, my dad, good-bye…

And the tears flowed.
It’s almost ten years later but the poignancy is fresh; the memories and pain, though hidden, flash back quickly, blindingly, staggeringly.

We spent the weekend at the Goldeye Center near Nordegg, AB with my Isaac family. Uncle Orlan’s and Aunty Cheri planned our gathering and put a lot of work into it. It was worth so much to me. It was like I was given permission to remember my dad and his heritage and bask in it.

The uncles stood together and I tried to imagine dad with them.

The siblings and spouses stood together, leaving gaps were Uncle Gerald & Aunty Maryanne, dad and Aunty Fay should’ve been. We asked lots of questions, Uncle Gerald’s family and ours. The uncles told stories and we really had a grand time all together.

For me it was a heavenly place.
Then we went to Stettler for Ralph Klassen’s funeral. Mom, Penny and I left Nordegg early Sunday morning. We stopped for a Timmy’s breakfast and talked straight time all the way there.

At the funeral we met the family… My heart hurts for their hurt. Somehow it seems so familiar. But it was healing and good to be there too, to listen to the singing, to meet old friends and to meet a bunch of writing group friends.


I am truly blessed.

5 comments:

  1. this is beautiful, Jo. (we must have been writing and posting at the same time!)

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  2. Sounds like you had a wonderful time!:) so glad for you...n yes the singing was heavenly at Ralph's funeral

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  3. I love this Jo. So close to my heart right now too… and now I know what you're taking about. I miss Dad.
    P.S. one of our cattle buyers attended also and said "the singing. The singing!" He'd never heard such like it.

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  4. Oh Jo! A beautiful post and I think that evening of memories was my favorite part!! Even if I am an in-law!!:))

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