Question.

Do you think she'll ever have time to write anything worthwhile again?

She's having a writing slump.

For one thing, she's up to her eyebrows in youth practice and Christmas program and buying gifts and planning meals. It's just life, she know, but... it's exhausting.

Yesterday they took out the program for the first time and the very first person she talked to at St. Joseph's had tears in her eyes and shook her hand so gratefully and told her "Thank you for the message!" Well, that is why she's chosen to be a youth-leaders wife. She doesn't have many options but it does pay off! Just one person can make it feel worth the wear and tear and sweat and tears.

And yesterday they farmed out all three boys and went home for a quick lunch before leaving for Saskatoon with everyone. And one hour by ones self is truly amazing.

In the evening they listened to everyone's inspirations about conference.

Their revivals start tomorrow.

Maybe in the new year... she said hopefully. Maybe someday she will write some coherent thoughts again.

??

Conference Week

Ladies and gentlemen, the time has arrived! We are currently partaking of conference week! I just got a text from my sis that they were waiting at the Saskatoon Airport, tiny little place that it is, with no less than TEN other Mennonites heading to the big town of Tupelo! Let the fun begin!

I wonder if everyone got the news clip about Tupelo preparing for conference?!? Maybe only six times??

I really wish we could go.

But we're planning on having a whale of a time at home. My mother is here, flew in last Saturday, and she's babysitting Rennie's family while they're gone.  We're hoping to see them a bit amidst it all.

Today is another gorgeous day; no snow, temps between -5C and +10C and sunshine. We've had some luscious florescent sunrises too and with the days getting shorter we can enjoy the sunrises and sunsets without arising and retiring at unearthly hours!

I've been thinking a lot about the verse "Come ye yourselves apart into a desert place and rest a while" (Mark 6:31) and that's my hope and prayer for us ALL this week, whether we're at home doing chores or babysitting or leading songs at conference or just sitting in the huge auditorium with ten thousand believers.

Let's have a little bit of heaven and rest a while at His feet.

Blessings.

Potty Training

Well, I too for one can say that I've had a seriously poopy week.

I started potty training Wyatt last Monday and this Monday I rejoiced with great joy and many cups of chai and coffee and such that it was not last Monday. There is always something grand to be thankful for!!

I also put on my new running shoes and walked my two miles on my treadmill with springy steps and bouncing boobs and jiggly hips. But I rejoice that I can walk! And new shoes are underrated!!

I ventured out of my house last Thursday afternoon to Linda's for tea with a dozen ladies. All sudden Bren said, "Jo-Jo, Wyatt's on the potty and the door is open, just in case you want to know!" It was a defining moment. His shorts were all wet but only because he didn't get on quick enough. He knows!!! Cheers!!

On Friday Pat & I took him to town, potty-chair stowed neatly beside the car-seat. I had all of five pairs of jeans, six shorts, two pullups and a whole roll of toilet paper along. And do you know I didn't use any?!? He happily went potty in every store I took him in, in the toilet even.

We bought a backhoe as a #2 reward. It worked. The first two times, anyway. Today I'm discouraged.

Yesterday we had Bob & Chris Goodnough, Alvin & Arlene Klassen and Greg & Liz Klassen over for dinner. I felt very Proverbs 31-ish. Until Wyatt came shuffling into the kitchen where we were doing dishes, needing help with getting his shorts and pants up. I trust that you won't judge.

Other than this all-consuming life change we've been keeping quite well.

I just finished reading Strawberry Girl aloud to my boys. I have two beautiful new Christmas pieces of fabric that are begging for attention. My mither-mother is flying out here on Saturday to keep Rennie's children next week while they go to conference. We are blessed, blessed, blessed!

So it's another gorgeous fall day! We're living on borrowed fall weather, for sure. But we're enjoying it immensely. Excuse me, I'M enjoying it immensely. My boys can't WAIT until the snow flies... I understand. Sort of.

Wanna come join me for some earl grey tea and mixed nuts? I know.. where are my pumpkin muffins and chocolate cupcakes?! Hiding! :) I'm being so so careful! Ha.

So... two weeks ago we rented a tree spade and moved 47 of our six to nine foot Colorado blue spruce to their respective spots on the yard. It only took us eight years! Not bad, eh? We're quick people, ha! It seriously feels so good! We have approximately 350 trees left to move and at the rate we're going we should have the whole thing accomplished in 56 years! Pat is hoping to build his own tree spade this winter and I'm looking forward to next spring!

And I've been sewing madly, mowing sadly. :) Pat's folks are planning on going to Window Rock as house parents for a year, leaving the beginning of January. This past week and a half I sewed dresses #4, 5 and 6 and cut dresses #7, 8 and 9. For mom, that would be. I quick did a dress for Bren in between but she cuts her own and I don't generally spend as much time on them.

So ya, folks are going to Window Rock! Isn't that exciting?! I think they'll do a fabulous job and we can hardly wait to go visit them! It's so much fun looking forward to things!

Last Sunday our Ukrainian friends came to visit us, bearing gifts of food as per their custom. Sergiy & Aryna Gryshchenko brought pomegranates, pickled peppers in a fancy oval jar, purple cabbage salad and devilled eggs on a devilled eggs platter with sprigs of parsley laid fancily on top. Oleksandr Karpenko (his wife was working, so she didn't come) brought black forest cake and black grapes. We love these dear people. Aryna told me all about their daughter Yulia, who just married a man 15 years older than her and had a baby. She's concerned for her...

Yesterday Pat went to help Merle on their new basement after we got home from town, so Melanie invited us for supper; Delisle pizza, Ceasar salad and fresh cinnamon rolls. Her girls printed off some mandalas after supper and we sat and coloured and visited.

Talk again soon.

What are you up to?

Writing Class Article - A Trip To Dinsmore

A Trip to Dinsmore

By Jo Oct 8/15

We rushed out the door after a hurried supper. Pat needed to go pick up oil from the Dinsmore Hutterite Colony for our used oil boiler. Winter is nearing and we go through a tote a month so part of our fall preparations is going to get oil.

I don’t always go along on these trips, but this time Pat asked if I would and I was happy for the little outing. It’s only a half hour drive south of our place and the drive went quickly.

Upon arrival we noticed the quiet yard and houses. We drove around a bit while Pat tried again to get Eddie, the preacher, on the phone. Pat has gone there lots of times before but I had never been to this particular colony and I was very interested in it all.

This colony was very neat and well taken care of. The houses were arranged in two long rows of plain apartment-style buildings. The shops were another row right in front of the houses, door after door, plain white with black trim. There was one small pot of flowers beside a full glass door that looked like it led to the kitchens.

After a while we noticed some commotion by one house door. Two little girls were peering out, their full skirts swinging in the evening breeze and their black polka dot caps flapping behind them when they ran back inside. A stout short man in plain black dress pants and jacket stepped out under the little yard light by their door. The swinging screen door slammed shut behind him as he stepped out and Pat jumped out of the pickup to talk to him.

Very shortly Pat jumped back in and we backed across the yard to the first shop. “Eddie, himself!” he said. I nodded as he jumped back out. Colby and Zach grabbed their jackets and jumped out too. I unbuckled Wyatt and told him to sit by me and pretend he was driving.

“I hate your house!” a rounded bearded face said at Pat’s open door. I recognised Eddie.

I looked at him, surprised and then laughed. I didn’t know what to think but maybe he had seen our place sometime, though I was sure I’d never met Eddie before today.

I talked with Wyatt and read my emails and talked with my mom and sisters on Whatsapp. Wyatt kept opening the windows so I put on my jacket. Soon Pat was ready to drive around to the back of the shop for the last tote of oil. Eddie opened the furthest shop door and we drove right inside the clean, neat shop. The last three bays were covered with what looked like gravel to me but soon Eddie came and leaned in Pat’s window.

“Wanna try some sunflower seeds?” he asked.

“Sure!”

Three little girls crowded close to Eddie at the window.

“I have six girls,” he informed me. “No boys. The girls do a lot of work. See those sunflower seeds? That’s their job! They do that in the evenings. Right now we’re harvesting carrots. We provide carrots to all the Co-ops in Saskatchewan!”

“Wow!” I said, impressed. “That’s a lot of carrots!”

“Do you help?” I asked the girls.

“We babysit,” the oldest one answered.

“We use a carrot digger that came all the way from Prince Edward Island!” Eddie said. “My other girls are learning their German.” It came out sounding like ch-erman.  I watched him as he grabbed a paper plate from the middle sized girl. “Here, for you,” he said and handed me a plate of cookies stacked four high all around.

“Whatever! Thank you very much!” I laughed. “This is so nice of you! Did you girls bake them?” I knew instantly that they hadn’t. Of course, they have cooks that provide for everyone but it’s such a natural thing to ask.

“No,” they said shyly, looking at me.

Soon Pat was done pumping oil and we backed out of the shop and said our goodbyes.

“Well,” Pat said, “Eddie says he heats our house.”

I laughed. I had misunderstood.

Best Fall Things (Oct 4)

• pumpkin spice muffins at Tim Horton's
• pumpkin chai from David's Tea
• sweaters
• scarves
• leggings
• pumpkins and gourds
• harvest moon
• tomato relish, veggie juice and salsa in neat rows in the pantry
• chilly evenings curled up by the fire
• fresh BC apples
• boxes of tomatoes 
• yellow leaves scattered on green grass
• lunch-kits and ball-gloves
• sunflowers
• square bales
• geese honking
• dusty fields
• dreaming about making a quiet book
• quilts

In Which Mrs. Brown Drinks Joy - Week 1 Writing Class

In Which Mrs. Brown Drinks Joy

By Jo Sept 10/15

Mrs. Brown swings her arms, pulls her skirt up to her knees and faces the sun. It’s a magnificently gorgeous day on the vast plains of Saskatchewan, blue-blue harvest bowl sky, golden fields of stubble, crickets chirping and birds flying. The grass is lush and green from the fall rains and there’s a nip in the air that can only mean frost in the near future.

Mrs. Brown is alone on the country gravel road. Her closest neighbours are a mile and a half away and the birds and crickets are her company. Every breath she breaths is thanksgiving… today. Some days are not so. So many things fill Mrs. Brown’s mind; the lunch she had yesterday with Mrs. Hildebrand, the liver test a close family member is waiting for anxiously, her oldest child’s school needs…

But today. Today is joy, joy, joy. Every blade of grass is dancing with joy to be alive. Every leaf on the trees around her sings and twirls, so happy to do what God has bid them. The birds flit and fly, alive; so happy. Mrs. Brown wants to dance but she runs instead, every breath a prayer, a praise, a song.

If there were not so much pain and heartache in this world, the joy would not be so… there, so precious, so close to Him.

Mrs. Brown slows to a walk, savouring the warmth. Instinctively she looks up as a cloud crosses paths with the sun. How real to life. Each day must have its little troubles to make the sunshine special. Each life must have its trials to make the person whole, complete and capable of grasping joy.

Mrs. Brown heads inside. She opens more windows and gulps down a glass of water. Her work is waiting; dishes to do, toys to pick up, laundry to put away. Her heart is full, full of joy gulped in thankful breaths on a fall walk.

Monday

Hi, you all. It's a lovely Monday here, mind you, rather cold. When I got up this morning it was +2C and it's warmed up considerably to +8C. But the sun is shining and the geese are honking and gathering in crowds on nearby sloughs and it really does feel delightfully fall-ish. I think Mondays are one of my favourite days. Just good ol' stay-at-home days.

It feels rather boring to write about laundry and baking every Monday but it's so normal and enjoyable. Today I added salsa to my list. I even threw a jalapeno roast in the crock-pot for supper and collected the garbage from upstairs. Things are looking up, no doubt.

Last week I had a bit of a 'Grandma Dora' week. We had such a lovely quick trip through the mountains last weekend to Creston for Jerry & Karen's 25th anniversary and we hit the ground running at home. It was my busing week, Pat was gone late three nights, Wyatt & I had colds, I had a 'Cobra books' day, I babysat Robin & Alex one day and went to town with Pat on Friday. Saturday we had an Dean Esau party at Jeffs for Alison's birthday and Sunday we had a Wilbert Esau party at Arlen's for his (Arlen's) birthday... Oh, my. Don't I feel better just saying it?! LOL.

Anyway, I think I'm going to stay home from church cleaning tomorrow. And I'll try to get to Bertha tea on Wednesday and the singing will be fun at youth meeting on Thursday.... I'm into writing poetry (like, more than usual, ha) and here's my latest just thrown out there:

Rugged Rockies

Snowy Peaks
Foggy Caps
Forest Spruce
Mossy Floor

Shaggy Bear
Massive Moose
Jumpy Rabbit
Lightning Squirrel

Blue-Green Water
Splashing Stream
Rocky Edge
Peaceful Lake

God's Grandeur

~~~~~~~
Just
Go ahead
Say those
Words
Even though
They aren't true
And
You don't feel that way
Just say
Those
Kind
Words
~~~~~~~

Do you agree with this last one? Is it right to say kind words if they aren't true? Is it better to just be quiet?

And some Wyatt (or Quiet, like Reyna calls him) thoughts:

Last week on the bus when Austin (grade nine) jumped in, "Oh, HI!! You are sweet!"

"Do-So... TOOT-TOOT! That's my favourite song!"

On the way home from Jeff's, "Mom, are you tired, too?"

And in Sunday school when Pat was leading songs he became a dog, "Bow-wow-wow!!!"

The time before that Pat asked if anyone had a number and Wyatt said, "Seven!" and then was so surprised and embarrassed he wept on my shoulder for a good while.

Anyway, there are no dull moments. And we have much work to do...

Have a splendiferous day!!

Happy Thursday!

Hi, friends!

It's another lovely fall day in mid-western Saskatchewan. It feels like our lovely warm days are numbered and we cherish every one. I helped bring hot lunch to school today; chalupas, the fixings, french bread, bars and iced tea. The oldest two classes played ball for a good hour longer and of course it's fun to join in.

Just totally random thoughts. This morning Wyatt woke up before everyone else and stood at the top of the basement stairs and hollered, "Time to get up, boys!!". They enjoyed that and so did I. He's a real early bird, that one.

I cut a dress for myself this morning. It's been months and quite frankly, I could use them. I'm trying a new pattern from Janelle, bless her.

And yesterday Zach was helping me put the rice on the table for supper. He swung the round glass baking dish which was resting in a largish nine by thirteen holder up over his head and sauntered off to the table. Just like that it when flying off and landed on the floor in a million pieces of burning hot shards of glass and sticky rice. It was a sobering and lengthy time until we actually partook of baked fish and fresh bread.

I've been harvesting lovely huge ripe tomatoes from my garden. We've had lots of fresh salsa and toast and tomato sandwiches and such. Also, I pulled my corn, dug the potatoes and pulled the beans. It's looking suspiciously like fall out there. Just the huge pumpkin plants are overtaking everything. The peppers and tomatoes are going strong and I have yet to pull my beets. Arlene Hildebrand said she canned beets for smoothies. Now that's a new one for me but it'd probably be good!

Pat, Colby, Arlen, Scott and Bob are planning on going camping in La Ronge Friday and Saturday. Colby is absolutely stoked. We didn't get way up there this year because of all the forest fires earlier. So that's pretty exciting.

What's up in your life?

WW Introductions

So apparently I'm not part of the WW now when I really wanted to be. Oh, well... Laugh or cry, so I'm gonna laugh.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

What kind of vehicle gets you from point A to point B? A dark grey 2011 Chev Acadia. It's the eight passenger one so our three boys sit across the middle and the back seats are generally down. 

Describe your attire right now. Bright aqua thick stretch with princess seams, darts in the skirt, a tall rolled collar and angel wing sleeves. My hair is down, my feet are bare and resting on my aqua poof.

What colors are your favorite to wear? blue, pink, white, aqua, grey, teal, 

Do you prefer plain, floral or patterned material? Hmm. Not so much floral, though I like floral. I love geometrical designs and stripes and a lot of plain pieces. 

Food group you like best. Salads, chocolate

What do you struggle with spiritually? Remembering too much. Negative feelings. Offense.

Who waits more on each other- your husband or yourself? Seriously, my hubby waits on me. He treats my like a queen. But as in waiting for each other to leave a function or something we'd be even.

What is your favorite summertime drink? Icecap or water

What is your favorite wintertime drink? Caramel Drizzle Coffee with cream

What is your body shape and style? (opt) big boned, wide hipped, long legged. A baby tummy.

Your height? 5'8"

Glasses, contacts, laser, or none? None

What kind of hair do you have and color of it? ( a little more than brown,
please) Medium brown with lots of grey on the sides, thin, straight, pouffy in the front

Skin color? Very pale, lots of freckles

Eye color? Blue/green/grey

What is your most favorite household chore? vacuuming

What is your least favorite household chore? Cleaning tubs

Food group you like best? Chocolate, salads

Do you bleach your dishrags? Always

What is your decorating taste? Modern traditional. I really like shabby and country in other people's houses but it's just not me.

What do you do in your spare time? Sew! Read, write, craft.

Some days, what do you choose to do rather than work? Read/write.

What would you like to attain in this life? I've always dreamed of starting a coffee/craft/fabric/quilting shop. It's not very likely, but it's a dream that's lived a long time.

When was the last time you cried? Not sure. I don't cry very easily but when I do... whoa, ugly cry.

If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Absolutely bright fuschia pink.

What book(s) are you reading right now? Secrets of a Charmed Life by Susan Meissner, Moloka'i by Alan Brennert, Trim Healthy Mama.

What is most likely to irritate you? Fighting children, loud noises.

Are you a morning or evening person? Used to be evening but I've become morning.

If you disliked one of your husband’s favorite shirts would you (a) get rid
of it (b) let him keep wearing it 

Depends, I do some of both. 

 If you could change one thing to make your life more enjoyable what would it
be?  Not sure. I have it pretty good.

Inspiration

Ephesians 3:20 Now unto Him that is able to do EXCEEDING ABUNDANTLY above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,

And the words of this song...

Let Thy goodness like a fetter bind my wandering heart to Thee.

She takes up her trusty pen once again.

A lovely new day is dawning with misty, foggy sweeps of light piercing the eastern sky. Geese honk low over the land and settle for food and fellowship around the sloughs and now empty fields. The tractors and combines are stopped (too early and too wet) and tired farmers are snug in their beds.

Fall has arrived with beauty and vigor. The long tended gardens and perennial beds are overflowing with produce and mounds of pink and yellow flowers. The cool nights bring dew and darkened colours to the tired summer grass and it has taken on the richest deepest colours of fall. Mister Big Chief Okanese poplar shakes his gigantic leaves gently and stubby round Fat Albert Spruce swings his blue tipped branches methodically.

The land is alive with joy.

I am too. I awoke early to a brand new day with no plans. I slipped out of bed and watched Pat and Colby jog out to the corner where we keep Storm, bringing him food and water for the day. Pat is always put together well and his oldest son is a splitting image of him. (I can’t say spittin’. Whoever thought of spittin’ anyway?) Colby and Zach have spent the last couple of weeks doing long days at the shop, helping with rods. They’re actually working, I’ve heard. This is the best thing that could happen to them.

I always have a birthday in August and this year was no exception. I think it was the best birthday I’ve had in eons. We met Rennie & Bren and their family at the Berry Barn down by the river. It’s a beautifully landscaped place with a restaurant specializing in waffles, sausage and toppings. It has a huge diverse gift shop, a large Saskatoon orchard, even a place for the children to play outside. Bren and I strolled all the way down to the gazebos where they host weddings. She and I could talk for hours just about our houses and children and this day was the day. I think my children are rightfully surprised at how I act with my sister. They were all playing on these wooden trains and truck and we went and joined them. I jumped on and someone hollered “All aboard!!” and Bren and I proceeded to loudly ‘tooot’ in three part harmony (she got Shani to join us). It was rather realistic, even with the Doppler affect at the end. Only a few people stopped and stared. J

I got some lovely gifties too. I wouldn’t say I’m such a big birthday person as others in Pat’s family but I always appreciate the love of friends and family. Just a little list of thangs I received: Notes From a Blue Bike, Love The Home You Have, The Holiday Cookbook by PW, a large fall candle and braided fall mat, a rustic blue pitcher, a bright pink over the door (shoulder boulder holder) – no, no. A bright pink over the door hook set, an orange geometrical patterned bag for keeping food cool, a beautiful plate with a tall angel food cake frosted delightfully (from my heart sister), a pretty new mug with my favourite chai tea bags. I feel very, very blessed.

What have you been up to? Is it fall in your area?

Happy July

Just for laughs! Does this even look like us?

I'm sitting in my pyjamas in my living-room with a Caramel Drizzle coffee and two cream. Wyatt is roaming and singing. It's still raining, a continuation of yesterday and it's wet, wet, wet; a good thing for our dear land.

My mom and Grandma Eidse left early this morning. They stopped for a full day on their way to Richard & Vicky's wedding and a full day on their way back. We are truly blessed. I don't think many children get to know their Great-Grandparents in that way! Also, Uncle Arvid & Aunt Linda stopped for Sunday lunch and night. Last week Bill & Penny, Kajsa and Ster stopped for a couple days. And Clint & Chels did as well. We've been blessed-blessed with company! And we love it! And just to clarify, Bren and I have split company for nights and we've spent lots of days and meals together.

Abigail's Hotel in Victoria

Yesterday was Shani's 14th birthday and Zach's 11th birthday and last Friday was Jenae's 12th birthday so yesterday we had a big ol' birthday party for all three of them!

Also, this month we celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary! Rennie's kept our boys (we traded earlier when they went for their 15th) and we flew off to Vancouver for a couple of lovely days. We had a wonderful relaxed time. One highlight for me was getting our caricatures done down at the water-front in Victoria. Les Bignold (my grade 7 teacher) had just passed away and this artist that drew us reminded me so much of Les. It was therapeutic. We also took the ferry across to Victoria, spent time at the Butchart Gardens, ate lovely food, went for ice-cream, had beautiful hotel rooms and drove along the coast. It was awesome! Refreshing, rejuvenating, inspiring, relaxing.

And! Zach got the go-ahead from the plastic surgeon last Tuesday that he is good to go with his back! Then on Thursday he got his cast off and he is truly healed! He's still limping a bit, the doctor said he would, but that day Mom bought an ice-cream cake in celebration and we all celebrated together; Bill's, Rennie's, Mom, Grandma Eidse and us.

I'm not sure what all else we've done in the last couple of weeks. The boys went to bible school (and I wasn't one bit involved); I've spent a few days at the shop (Cobra year-end); we went to Shane's for a picnic supper one night with Lance & Lana and Margaret Fehr; we went to Saskatoon for a picnic with Jays, Arley's and Rennies.

The Sunken Garden at the Butchart Gardens

And summer flies by... I'm looking forward to school starting again, believe it or not. Not the busing part or early mornings, but the schedule. One more month of holidays. School starts on September 3rd.

Have a wonderful day!

Time to Update

Forest Fires

Northern Saskatchewan has had at least 592 forest fires this year already, currently 113 active fires. Roughly 400,000 hectares (4000 square kilometres) which is equal to three times the size of New York City has been affected by Saskatchewan wildfires this year. That does not include the observation zone in remote areas, where wildfires are burning freely without any firefighting efforts. There are currently more than 12,000 evacuees from 54 communities, 12 homes have been destroyed, and 600 people are fighting fires with 360 additional military personnel.

Just in case you’re interested.

Camping Trip 2015

I may write more on this at a later date, but our camping trip was nearly thwarted by northern wildfires. We decided to go with Rennie & Bren this year and ended up at the Narrows Campground on the west side of Lake Waskesui, about three hours south of our usual destination, Otter Lake.  We had a lovely relaxed time together in the lush remote campsite. The children were not deterred by the haze of smoke that stopped our boating adventure or the fire ban slapped down on us one day in. They happily played ‘city’, using empty campsites for their respective stores, hospitals and restaurants. At one point I walked by to the washroom and they were all gathered around a picnic table and Wyatt obviously had the floor. A town council, I got told. So, when we decided to leave one day early most of our group was cooperative and when we got back to the town of Waskesui and got told we would have got evacuated yet that afternoon we were happy we had packed up and left before nightfall. It’s all about memories, folks.

Zach

Zach is doing great. He has enough energy to fuel himself and his two brothers, like usual. He has a very high pain tolerance which may be good but has its challenges. As of this week, he can start bending and using his back. The thing is he’s been riding bike (carefully, he says), running with his leg crutch and playing wildly rolling around on the floor. The only thing I worry about is that the stitches from a layer down are starting to peak through. And as for his foot, do you want the short story or the Bronson story? In emergency he got told he had two breaks, then two days later when orthopedics came to decide if he needed surgery or not he got told there was only one break and it wasn’t very bad. Two weeks ago when he went for his hard cast they said no, he has one bad break and one chipped bone. The bad break hasn’t healed at all (and apparently can’t be seen from a top view x-ray) and if it’s ok and healing open he can have his cast off in two weeks but if indeed it isn’t healing we are heading for surgery and pins. I’ve decided not to think about it.

Social Life

Where do I start? We’ve been going strong… Warman Bible School is currently half over, so tonight is a wiener roast and volleyball down at the river. Last night we joined our friends at Pike Lake for supper with Colin & Denise. Last Sunday we spent with the youth and Warman Bible School committee and teachers. One day Michelle and I took our boys to the zoo together, where Zach immensely enjoyed popping wheelies with the wheelchair. I’m quite sure they enjoyed the animals too. Last Saturday we had the privilege of having Gregorio & Joy Pedernal (Pat’s Philippino worker), their two sons, Jethro (3) and Ezra (1), and Greg’s parents who have just moved to Canada from the Philippines over for dinner. We had a very interesting time with them. We also spent one weekend in Swan River with 150 youth and 40 youth leaders. That was very very inspiring. We are so blessed! We travelled there and back with the Leoville youth group and leaders on a big bus and that was fun too! There is no want for excitement in my life. Just saying.

Inspiration

We had a beautiful message about the end time last Sunday. I can’t remember exactly what inspired me but I know my heart said amen, and my thirsty soul was quenched. The guest speaker at Singspiration had an absolutely beautiful and inspired message about finding Rebecca at the well (Genesis 24). I loved how open and truthful he talked about the desires of our hearts and making sure we follow God’s leading. We did lots of singing on that trip and I’m always blessed and inspired by singing. This was exceptional.  I feel like I’ve been living such a busy life that my needs have been shown me in a new and direct way. A small bad attitude can flourish into an angry tempest in the blink of an eye and I realize again that I’m so very needy, so very small, so unworthy of HIS great Love and forgiveness.

Lawn & Garden

My garden is an epic fail. I’m trying to see the humour in it and really, I’m glad I don’t have so much to take care of… but it’s a little disappointing. First off, we had a really late hard frost, then a mole took over most of my bedding plants and then the weeds invaded. Oh, and the very first thing I did was order only a fraction of the corn I needed. So I have about ten plants of corn (I ordered my corn from Audrey now instead) and a skimpy row of carrots, the two cucumber plants got tilled under in my husband’s zeal to help the weed situation and about a fifth of the pea row came up. Will you laugh together with me at this point?!? The good news is that the grass is green and lush, my lime hydrangea is blooming (!), the roses are full of blooms and my two big pots of vines, spikes, ferns and coleus by my front door are beautiful, if I may admit.

Of Mishaps and God's Goodness

So...

We had a really wonderful time at our Eidse Festival in southern Alberta. It was relaxing, inspiring, exciting, delicious. It was poignant, memorable, delightful, humorous. I honestly haven't laughed so long and hard for a while. It was just good. I love me my family!

And then we got home.

And two days later Zach had a rendezvous with the go-cart, a very scary episode. He ended up being in the hospital from Tuesday night until Sunday morning; a broken foot, seven stitches in his knee and surgery on his back Saturday night to stitch up the wound.

Now he needs to be off his foot for 6-8 weeks. He can't do anything with his back for two weeks, like not bend over to tie his shoes or pull on his jeans. And then no sports, go-carting, jumping on the tramp, etc. for another six weeks.

It's been... hard, crazy, tiring.

I never dreamed I'd be able to nap in the hospital on a flimsy little cot in the middle of the afternoon. I've never thought about watching my child go in to surgery or wheel-chair hospital halls or get stitches in his knee. I don't want to think about it. But I still see him under the go-cart, jumping up and running across the driveway only to fall on his stomach. I see the open wound on his back, his shredded clothes and the look on Pat's face as he scoops him up and carries him inside.

We are so blessed. We have life, we have clothes to wash, dishes to do, shoes to buy. We have everything we could ever wish for. And more.

I'm so very grateful for my dear sister and all her help and support, my dear husband and his constant vigil (he did all the nights at the hospital), for my mom-in-law and her free bed and breakfast and babysitting service, my friend Jodi and her instant help (driving me in to the hospital) and late night pizza and Tim's drinks, etc. I'm so so thankful for the people that took the time to come in and show they cared. Today my friend Ruby came for coffee and ended up vacuuming my whole house and cleaning up. I'm so very grateful....

And so I cry.

For what could have been. For what I have. For the dear church and people around us. For the teachers, the students, the network of love around us...

It’s Like This

So many things to do in so little time: the story of our lives. J

We’re leaving tomorrow for southern Alberta where we plan to meet my Eidse cousins and aunties and uncles and Grandma; my mom and siblings, too. We’ve been planning this grandé festival for a long time and I’m so very excited!

In the next three weeks we hope and plan to attend said festival, partake of and attend year-end program and play day (including youth activities such as the annual concession booth, cleaning mice outta the youth shed and the annual rib supper), attend youth singspiration in Swan River (5.5 hours away and how many evenings of practicing songs and planning) and send Pat’s folks off with pomp and show to the Edmonton girls unit for two months (which also includes a bit of sewing).

In the last week I’ve finished five dresses, one slip, one quilt, one bag and two books, with the emphasis on the books. I absolutely loved The Spy Wore Red, Love Without Limits was so-so and I just plum couldn’t get past a couple chapters of Once Upon A Prince.

We’ve dined on food more basic than most of you can imagine, left the floors until the grit about trips us and done home-work and studied for exams until the mother’s eyes are crossed and her brain in fudge. Yes, the mother. How does the child feel? I don’t know. It’s been a stretch. And I’m not going to bother telling you the whole story to a) protect my child, b) save your brain (and heart) and c) save mine. Also, my garden is an epic fail; a mole, late frost and no rain (ahem, apparently I haven’t heard about sprinklers). My ash trees had just leafed out and we got a heavy frost, so they’re starting again and thankfully are alive.

K. I’m off to collect blankets and sheets, towels and washcloths, playpen and gaunch.

I’m sorry. J

Have a wonderful day!

Friday Thoughts

It's another beautiful spring day in central Saskatchewan, where the wind blows strong, the birds start singing at four in the morning when the sun comes up and the tractors and seeders are on the fields almost around the clock. It's a gorgeous time of year. The apples, chokecherries and lilacs are blooming, casting their pungent perfumes to the winds. The rhubarb plants are hearty mounds of huge leaves with hidden fruit and the gardens have little onion tips peeking through the sandy soil.

I have a small metal tub with rope-covered handles sitting on my deck. It has a dark pink tea rose in full bloom, small white flowers around the bottom and a solar light that glows softly in the gathering dusk. It's from my heart sister, bless her. It has brought me such joy already.

This morning Pat and I sat with cups of strong brewed coffee and mouths full of cracked black pepper and olive oil Triscuits, cheese and baby dills, watching the sun play across the finished entrance, enjoying the beauty of a lovely spring morning. Just to pause in the rush-rush the season brings is gratifying, blessed. We have so much to be grateful for!

I have moments of panic over balls thrown in the house, overwhelmed feelings about busing on time and food for public occasions and no answers about finishing homework, talking back and getting up on time. As a mom, I'm pulled taut, I'm fulfilled, I'm complete. The only saving grace in my life is God's and possibly never so clear cut. It's amazing.

I had a moment of clarity on Tuesday. Pat's mom and I went to the Berry Barn for lunch, just the two of us, for Mother's Day. We were sitting there at a little table overlooking the river, eating our mushroom soup in bread bowls and drinking coffee. The breezes lifted the heat every once in a while and the voices and clinks of dishes around us made it feel surreal. In the blink of an eye it's going to be me and my daughter-in-law.

The passing of time always brings a bitter-sweet feeling. I stand with heart and hands out in the breeze, like Abbie in A Lantern In Her Hand, thinking Oh, stop time! Stop! And I know that today is the only day to live.Today is my gift. Today is the best thing that has ever happened because it brings us one step closer to Him. I feel everything so deeply, unfortunately the bad as well as good, and I cry for little babies grown up, for children missing their Grandpa's presence, for the pain the world around. (I cry about silly things like white hair and mice in the house too.)

Yesterday my mom-in-law came and helped me wash all my windows on main floor, no small feat whatsoever! She's amazing! She can run circles around me! I told her I'd sew for her in exchange, in hopes of paying back, at least in part, this debt. Clean windows and clean floors? Nothing beats it, my friends! And working together with someone you love makes it better than ever.

Now I'm off to finish a dress for Bren, clean up my kitchen and dress Wyatt. I think I'll finish my coffee too. It's cooling off but that's okay. Today is here for me to live.

It's a girl!!

Announcing...

Sadie Willow Koehn
born to
Abram & Ashley Koehn
on
May 20, 2015
at
3:10am
weighing
7lbs 4oz
measuring
20"

Wyatt Thoughts

• No, eat porridge by myself, k? Not a chance!
• Mom, daddy says oops-daisy.
• Call, Grandma, now, k?
• Mom, who's that? (About every noise he hears. It's a busy life.)
• Fishy-copter (every helicopter he sees)
• Goodness sakes! (about cousin Ralph's braided hair)
• Mom, daddy says Pete's sake, k?
• Do it self!
• Mommy, I'm tired too. (when he needs a nap)
• Fishy-beak (Pat's RC helicopter front)
• Wade, Rennie, cowboys...
• Missy (Misty) nice, Wade nice, Quinton nice...
• Candy crush, self!!
• My ear hurts terrible much!
• (Praying for dinner) Thank you for... daddy...(I whisper good) mommy... (I whisper good) Colby... (I whisper good) Zach... (I whisper good) (long pause) (I whisper Wyatt?) Good (says Wyatt) Amen
• (Wyatt was sitting in the laundry basket after his shower, naked with his blanket around him. He all sudden jumps out) Forever more!! Pee here!!
• Hokey Dinah sakes!!
• Whoo-hoo canoe!
• Thank you much!
• Sucker! Dummy! (about people he doesn't like)
• You stop it right now, k? (to Colby and Zach)
• Be nice, boys!!
• Beep! Beep! (when he wants someone to move)
• (every time we turn the corner at Co-op in Delisle) GRANDPA's place!!!
• Can we? Can we? Can we?
• (Every time we turn in at Wendel's) Josh place!
• Josh, our place? Should we? Should we? Should we?
• (puts his hands around my face when I put him to sleep) Friends!
• No stinks, just puff.
• cane (for train. and we hear a LOT about canes. He can say truck and track but train, no way.) 

Very Important Information (ha)

1. My phone has died an untimely death. If I don't reply to texts, etc. there's a reason. :(

2. My beloved new-ish sewing machine has died a very untimely death. It's in at the the sewing machine surgeon and I have no idea how long it'll be under anaesthetics or how costly this adventure will prove to be. I'm trying not to think about it.

3. My oldy-goldy stand-by sewing machine has died a rather unfortunate and untimely death. The one I can take to sew at other places, you know? She is also at the sewing machine doctor....

4. My sewing room drawings? They absolutely will not upload here onto the ol' blog. I will write about the room sometime. But no one know when...

5. My sis and I have spent the last two days together. We cut ten dresses, partially sewed three and went grocery shopping together too.

6. We had an awesome time in Crooked Creek last weekend. Thanks to all my dear family! We sewed and packed and ate and talked. And it was way way too short. I didn't get to see nearly everyone I wanted to. And I brought home seven pieces of fabric. Gulp.

7. I have two finished baby quilts in my sewing room; one for Ash and one for Arnie. (Ash's baby is any day now and I'm hoping to make a big announcement here when the time comes!) One is my button quilt and one is stripes with an appliqued T on it and trucks and cars on the back. The latter one screams Arnie, in my humble opinion. :)

K, later...

Just Some Blither

I've quit the word of the week, aka {WW}. I'm hoping to do it again in September but my life now is sorta crazy. But isn't it always? And don't we all just choose to do what is most important? And we all have to have a little hobby or pleasurable thing to do amidst the chaos so I'm not going to feel guilty that I like to write.

But you know the people that like to write and read? Well, they don't generally have clean houses... And it sorta scares me. I mean, I like a clean house and I'm almost obsessive about a tidy house. I'd like to hire someone to clean. Whew, it's all about honesty here.

So, just random information here.

Last Saturday Zach just boom got a sore neck, couldn't turn his head or look up and just felt plum miserable. He told me a couple times that he felt just like he did at Christmas. We were in town and (of course when we got home) he asked me to feel his neck and sure enough he had a big lymph node same place as last time.

After talking with Aunty Cheri and Zach telling us how important it was for him to be at convert meeting the next morning we decided that we'd wait to go in to emergency until after church. Long story short; he saw the same doctor he had at Christmas (which proves to be a huge blessing). She said she thought this was Reactive Lymph Nodes and could be from the Cervical Adenitus earlier and we'll wait it out. If he gets worse, in we go lickety split and if not he's good to go. His lymph nodes are still puffy but he's not worse. Praise the Lord!

Bren told me at church that I was so worried partly because of dads huge lymph nodes in his neck before he died and she is absolutely right! I hadn't connected it but this freaks me so bad. Plus, I have too big an imagination....

Anyway.

This morning the plumbers came and hooked up my sink in my laundry room! There's just a little change on the roof line that needs to be done yet and we are done. Done. DONE. I want to yell!!! We are so so so so thankful.

I kinda like me house. :):)

And Wyatt climbed the bookshelf in the living room today and broke it. At least he's not harmed but that dear child! Sometimes I laugh and sometimes I cry! I have a big ol' list of stuff he's saying and I'm thinking of posting it but you all have to promise not to judge because I do not know where he gets everything from! Honestly!

And we're planning on going to Crooked Creek for the weekend. What with Mother's Day and Jerry's pulling outta there soon we decided it was a good time. I'm hoping to help Karen with her sewing and the men will help Jer in his shop. I talked to Di and mom this morning and we planned some food stuff. I'm so excited to see Crooked at this time of year. So often we go at Christmas and I've been craving a summer visit. Or spring, whatever.

Which reminds me, we've had a gorgeous spring here. It's been unnaturally warm, plus twenty-four today and I've been dreaming garden and flowers and trees. I let myself buy a couple trees every spring and so... I went to Costco and did the deed. I'm the proud owner of a September Ruby Apple, a Harcourt Apple, a Sem Ash Leaf False Spirea and then of course some others; Morden Fireglow Rose, Pink Thrift and Dianthus Border Pinks. Oh and another hosta for my shade bed behind the house.

The boys tilled the garden for me and scooped poop (crazy dog). They love to mow and trim and such so yard work is a good place to spend energy. Energy??? The more boys I have the more energy they have. I think I'll be young forever looking after them. Or maybe it's because I'm not so young that it feels like that. Hmm.

K, talk again soon.

P.S. Do you want to see the drawings for my sewing room? It'd give you an idea what it looks like. :)

{WW} phobia

I’ve never been very fond of planes.

I remember when I took my first flight. I was thirteen and needed a ride home from Creston after helping Karen when she had Ashley Jayne. Karen brought me to the little tiny airport in Cranbrook, B.C. and kissed me before I climbed into the little turbo prop plane that took me over the mountain ranges to Grande Prairie, A.B. It was a tremendously bumpy ride and I was all nerves.

When I was seventeen I flew down to Oklahoma to drive back with Pam when she was done teaching school there. It was my first time navigating a huge strange airport (Minneapolis) by myself. I also sat by a very fat man that tried to make conversation with me and I was freaked out.

But probably the biggest thing that has fuelled my dislike and aversion for planes was Gord and Adrian’s death in 2000. They built and owned a little two-seater plane, each working on getting their pilot’s licence. April 24^th their plane went down in a little patch of trees and marsh marigolds near Delmar and Brenda’s farm.

I’ve never been the same.

Our honeymoon was two and a half months later; a mixture of tears and laughter, sorrow and happiness. I surprised my dear new husband and myself by cowering on his lap, in tears, when a little plane flew close overhead. I talked lots about my fear of planes, only to find out that this dear man by my side was very interested in planes.

We were only married a few months when as we stood together in our front yard we witnessed a little plane from the airport school in Saskatoon practice his spiral and recovery. I lost it. Completely. I bawled and bawled.

I’ve tried real hard to work with myself. With a husband who likes to travel, I really have no options except to buck up and go with. Often, I’ve been comforted that at least our family is together if the plane goes down. Our trip to China was really, really hard for me. There was no way I was going to leave Wyatt at home even though it did really seem like he would be better at home. I fought it. In the end we decided to leave him and we updated our will, making it official at the lawyer. Every flight and many times during our trip, I wondered if this was my last day. I imagined Rennie's with Wyatt. I hoped they would buy our house.

I don’t know if I have a phobia of planes or death or what. Maybe it is grief and dealing with the happenings of my life. I do know that I feel much better than I used to. Flying is much easier than it used to be. And hopefully this journey can make me more understanding of someone else.

Things that bring me joy...

We all have this longing for beauty, for acceptance, for joy, for all the good things we perceive and understand God to be. And we all fall short. In my constant need for God I battle with thoughts of self-worth and discontent. I forget so easily the beauty He has given me and the blessings He bestows so graciously on me every day. I forget to be thankful.

The other day I was reading in my bible and the verse popped out at me with such clarity; And be ye thankful! It’s a command. It’s God’s admonition to me for this daily battle of tired mommy-brain, a houseful of men and the constant demands of busing school children/youth leader agendas/meal making/housecleaning, etc. Be ye thankful!

So today, I write another list… a thankful list.

1. 1.       My happy home.
2. 2.       A wonderful husband.
3. 3.       Three healthy children.
4. 4.       A Christian home.
5. 5.       My lovely house.
6. 6.       Warm weather.
7. 7.       Spring winds.
8. 8.       Budding trees.
9. 9.       Birds singing.
10. 10.   Swan pairs on the little lakes.
11. 11.   Pat’s parents.
12. 12.   Chai tea.
13. 13.   Fruit pizza.
14. 14.   Bren.
15. 15.   Coffee company.
16. 16.   Good friends and good gabbing.
17. 17.   Jodi.
18. 18.   Texas caviar and chips.
19. 19.   My big new pantry, in coral. :)
20. 20.   Rocking Wyatt.
21. 21.   Singing with Wyatt.
22. 22.   The boys all jumping on the tramp together.
23. 23.   Rhubarb growing.
24. 24.   Frogs croaking.
25. 25.   Planning a homemade ice-cream party for the youth.
26. 26.   Folding laundry on my big cutting table in my laundry room.
27. 27.   Marble-look counter tops.
28. 28.   Quilts.
29. 29.   Googling Caramel Praline Sauce and finding a good recipe.
30. 30.   Misty and the look on her face when I brought her a set of tiny little owl erasers.
31. 31.   Fresh bread.
32. 32.   Candles.
33. 33.   Green grass.
34. 34.   Boys that smell like woodsy shower gel and deodorant.
35. 35.   Ice water in a big clear glass.
36. 36.   Fresh strawberry jam.
37. 37.   Baseballs and bats, guns and ammunition, fishing rods and tackle.
38. 38.   Lockers.
39. 39.   Little camouflage rubber boots.
40. 40.   Boys, little and big, playing in the dirt in the garden.
41. 41.   Vanilla Biscotti Coffee, compliments of the Keurig.
42. 42.   Dark floors that hide a multitude of sins dirt.
43. 43.   Wade and Wyatt, playing together.
44. 44.   Seeds for the garden.
45. 45.   The safety of the church.
46. 46.   Books from the library.
47. 47.   My treadmill.
48. 48.   Pert Plus Shampoo.
49. 49.   Shirts to iron and jeans to patch.
50. 50.   Water for cleaning and washing and showering.
51. 51.   Hot water.
52. 52.   Zach setting the table, totally of his own accord.
53. 53.   Colby laughing almost ‘til he cries over Wyatt’s wise words.
54. 54.   Pat holding Wyatt during church.
55. 55.   Raspberry sauce (and cleaning all the raspberries outta my freezer.)
56. 56.   Crystal Kearnan staying for lunch.
57. 57.   Talking to my mom on the phone while I walk.
58. 58.   Blue summer sky with white fluffy clouds.
59. 59.   My string-of-pearls houseplant.
60. 60.   Tractors and seeders gearing up for planting.
61. 61.   Hope.
62. 62.   Joy in the journey

Chicken Penne Alfredo

Here's an awesome good recipe, sorta a Swanson hit, and rather fattening. :)

3 cups penne noodles
10 tbsp butter
1/4 cup flour
1/2 cup chopped onion
1 tsp Italian seasoning
1/2 tsp pepper
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp salt
4 cups chicken broth
2 cups cream
1/3 cup cornstarch
Parmesan cheese
3 lbs (4 large) grilled chicken breasts
1 pkg (12-16 oz) bacon
Mozza Cheese

Cook penne noodles. Drain and set aside. Melt butter. Add flour, onion and seasonings. Saute. Mix broth, cream and cornstarch and stir into onions, stirring until thickened. Add penne and stir a few minutes. Heat through. Layer into a 9 x 13 pan: penne mixture, Parmesan cheese, chicken, Mozza cheese and bacon. Bake at 400 for 15-20 min or until hot and bubbly.

Serve with Caesar salad and garlic cheese bread. Enjoy!

My notes: This does not fit in a regular 9 x 13 pan! And I use Hormel bacon bits.

Chalk Board

I've been forgetting, but this is what I did (my own version, of course) for my spring chalkboard. :)

Things that bring me joy...

• another shopping day with my sis
• a Sunday dinner invite
• congregational Easter program - so so inspiring
• frogs croaking
• sitting out by McDonald creek watching the glassy water flowing and a rich vibrant sunset and hearing the red-winged blackbird's throaty song 
• fun pattern suggestions from cousin Geri :)
• cleaning up the basement and storage room and putting ALL the books back in the big Ikea bookshelf 
• setting up the Papasan chair again (with the boys bright pillows inside) right beside the bookcase
• jars of brightly coloured pencil crayons and markers on the window sill in the basement and the sun reflecting colour all over the room
• folks bringing us supper one night and babysitting while we went to youth meeting!
• silence

{WW} Newspaper Clipping

Swanson Swapping’s Edition 1, Page 5, April 12, 2015

Esau’s Sport a New Skylight in Master Bathroom

As you all well know, Sunrise Builders has been labouring long and hard on Pat & Jo Esau’s dream cottage during the last two months. As of Thursday, April 9^th, Esau’s have become the proud new owners of a skylight in their master bathroom. “Though not exactly in our dreams and plans, we have decided to embrace the possibilities of this new adventure” Pat proclaims. Esau comes from a background of good old-fashioned ingenuity and he is certain there is potential for more than meets the eye at this point. Jo is a little more skeptical, beings she’s the one to most often take things at face value. “Less isn’t always more,” Jo was heard to say, at the scene of adventure, gazing upwards. Though neither Pat nor Jo seem to have definite plans for the finishing of the latest project, they are unanimously cheerful that the way the skylight came about did not involve a fatality of involved person(s) accomplishing this astonishing feat while completing the roofing job. Updates may or may not be available at personal inquiry: pjesau@sasktel.net or 1-306-493-3227.

Things that bring me joy...

• Bright teal doors in my entrance. :)
• Door handles on the bedroom doors. Ya'll, don't take it for granted!! ;)
• Another heart sister gifty - a beautiful little devotional book and Caramilk Easter eggs in a cute box. :)
• Heather stopping for coffee yesterday after busing; showing her my house and a good visit.
• Bringing a bunch of clothes for Russia to sewing. 
• Borrowing a bunch of books at the library again.
• Seeing Wyatt with the chicks at Rennies.
• Hanging stuff on the walls again.
• LOCKERS!!! I'm yelling but it's so exciting I can't help it!!
• No men (other than mine) in my house today!! :) lol

Some Explanations...

I haven't exactly been present here lately. Or reading others blogs. My life has been rather haphazard with all the work going on here but things are looking up! More on that soon.

I had a lovely weekend with my Isaac family. Maybe I'll write something about it soon.

We updated our filter on our computer and it's blocked all my blogger accounts for the last six weeks. And I've had too much going to change anything until now.

And today I have a sick child and a very grouchy one at that. So, anyway.

Let's talk soon.

{WW} Heavenly Places

It was late. The hospital lights were dim. Uncle Orlan had so kindly bought us each a hotel room just down the street but our hearts were with dad. We knew he didn’t have much time left. The pain wracking his body made him moan. The pain medication gave him tremors. Two huge cancer lumps had grown in his neck overnight and we were thankful he was not responding anymore.

In the quietness and darkness, Karen sat on one side of dad holding his hand and visiting with Uncle Orlan. Bren sat on the other side of dad, holding his hand and dozing. Softly and quietly dad breathed his last. He lay with his eyes shut, the pain immediately erased from his face.

We stood together, my siblings and I, our spouses close by. It was almost a physical feeling… so close to heavens’ gate we stood, so close we could almost hear the singing, the rejoicing on the other side.

We stooped and kissed his cooling cheeks. We held his hand, though still, now clasped in God’s.

Good-bye, my dad, good-bye…

And the tears flowed.

It’s almost ten years later but the poignancy is fresh; the memories and pain, though hidden, flash back quickly, blindingly, staggeringly.

We spent the weekend at the Goldeye Center near Nordegg, AB with my Isaac family. Uncle Orlan’s and Aunty Cheri planned our gathering and put a lot of work into it. It was worth so much to me. It was like I was given permission to remember my dad and his heritage and bask in it.

The uncles stood together and I tried to imagine dad with them.

The siblings and spouses stood together, leaving gaps were Uncle Gerald & Aunty Maryanne, dad and Aunty Fay should’ve been. We asked lots of questions, Uncle Gerald’s family and ours. The uncles told stories and we really had a grand time all together.

For me it was a heavenly place.

Then we went to Stettler for Ralph Klassen’s funeral. Mom, Penny and I left Nordegg early Sunday morning. We stopped for a Timmy’s breakfast and talked straight time all the way there.

At the funeral we met the family… My heart hurts for their hurt. Somehow it seems so familiar. But it was healing and good to be there too, to listen to the singing, to meet old friends and to meet a bunch of writing group friends.

I am truly blessed.