Writing Challenge - A story

Grandpa Esau came for supper again tonight. We like to ask him questions about his childhood and memories. Tonight he was reciting poems that he'd learned in his childhood. Here's one of them.


Trees

By Joyce Kilmer

I think that I shall never see

A poem lovely as a tree.

A tree whose hungry mouth is pressed

Against the earth’s sweet flowing breast;

A tree that looks at God all day,

And lifts her leafy arms to pray;

A tree that may in Summer wear

A nest of robins in her hair;

Upon whose bosom snow has lain;

Who intimately lives with rain.

Poems are made by fools like me,

But only God can make a tree.

He knew it perfectly. It about gave me goosebumps. I love poetry and I love Grandpa. And there is a reason we want our children to memorize things. What a gift it is in old age.

Cinquain Poem

Youngster

Lively, Vivacious

Shouting, Dashing, Playing

Intensely interested in learning

Wyatt

Season

Joyful, Peaceful

Praising, Singing, Praying

Best Gift Ever Given

Christmas

Chair

Overstuffed, Comfortable

Relaxing, Rocking, Reclining

Mother's place of honour

Président



A wedding and company and computer updates.

So, life happens.


We had a lovely holiday last week while our teachers went to school meeting. We went to Crooked Creek for Merv Toews and Sharon Wohlgemuth's wedding. We met so many dear old friends and family and crammed so much into our weekend. I'll just say it was good. So good.


And emotional.


Then, we travelled home on Monday and Cam & Luci and their six children came for night. It was so so good to connect with Luci again. Her and I taught school together in Hythe that year that everything happened. The year Gord and Adrian died. The year that ten of my friends got married, including her. Including Bren. Including being bridesmaid two times. Including much much much.


Anyway, it was just the best to be with Luci. And Luci is Sharon's older sister. And Char's older sister. And Char is one of my best friends. And Char was my almost-bridesmaid. We only had one attendant each but Char and Arnie were my front-bench-friends. Anyway, it was just so good to be together.


And then we had Mr. Barkman over Tuesday night and Pat had Villa meeting and Colby shot a deer and skinned, gutted and butchered it all by himself and I helped Colin with his Christmas art project.


And then, we got some more company Wednesday night. Darc & Marilee and their two girls came for night. They are old friends of ours, she's Pat's cousin and we hadn't touched base for a long, long time. It was just so good to be together. Pat's folks got home late Wednesday night from being gone two weeks and they came for breakfast with Darc's. And then we went to folks for supper with Jeffs.


And this morning I slept in. Like, seriously. I woke up when the bus drove on the yard to pick up Zach. And the boys were all still sleeping. I guess it just all caught up to us.


And this morning I finally had a moment to figure out the filter stuff on our computer and phones and all that good stuff. So ya. It is what it is.

Oct 31st - Heart of a Warrior

 I sat in my chair in the evening, my gums still bleeding and my mouth tender and went over my day. I certainly felt like a warrior but I'm not sure how my heart was, possibly a little chilled.




It started out good. I had arranged for mom to keep Wyatt because I knew two hours in the dentist's office would be a little trying for him. Mom needed to go to an appointment shortly after lunch and she wanted me back at her place as soon as possible.


There are a few things we aren't in control of, though. One of them is how long we spend in a dentist chair. I was very grateful for my careful dentist and how everything turned out but I did spend quite a bit of the almost-four hours rather tense and practicing my box-breathing. So when I finally was sitting in my vehicle, frozen and sore and bleeding and mom called and said she wanted to go to Steph, I asked if she would mind taking Wyatt with. There was no way I could make it to her place in half an hour and lunch seemed pretty high on my list right then.


I was supposed to wear my retainer right away but every time I put it in blood seeped down and around all my teeth. I looked a bit like a vampire, albeit a tired one. So each stop I made I pulled it out, mopped up the red and hoped for the best.


I stopped at Steph on my way home to pick up Wyatt and I ended up having coffee and fresh cookies that mom had baked with them.


Home at last, I put groceries away and made supper. I baked fish and fried potatoes and heated up one of my jars of canned carrots. Such a simple meal, but Pat thanked me a couple times. Possibly he was remembering a similar day last week when I served cereal and toast for supper. Who knows.


I sat sipping my tea, curled up in my chair. Really, everything went very well and my teeth looked so much better. I was so happy to be as far as I was on my braces journey.

Thoughts on Writing

I write to record our life, for our boys. I write because I have to express how I feel and see things.  I hope to someday put a little something together for my boys for memories. Another bonus is that writing is safe in this private little blog. It's not publishing everything on the housetops.


There are so very many things I want to write about.


Take last night for example. We were all in bed when suddenly Colby came running up to our room and whispered, Dad, come quick! Well, if Colby runs and if Colby says come quick, it's something to check out. We ran down with the boys to check out the big red fox on our deck. It had cornered Tattoo and Pinklepur. They were each clinging to a brace of a post of the deck, way up there. The fox was traipsing back and forth, eyeing the cats. Colby had his gun and shells ready and needed Pat to open the door real quick. It didn't happen quick enough. The fox got away. I grabbed the cats and cuddled and held them inside. They hearts were pounding. Needless to say, they spent the night in the garage. It would take Colby to find the fox. He'd seen the tracks on the deck earlier. He told me a fox or a coyote had been right by our front door and I didn't believe him.


These are the things I want to remember.


I think sometimes it would be fun to look back over other things. Like Wyatt explaining something at supper. It was zilch. Nothing. We all laughed.


Or my days. Today I bused and helped wash church windows in the morning and had an impromptu Villa board ladies meeting to plan Christmas supper. We ended up only eating lunch at 1pm. And then I talked to Char about the wedding next weekend and did laundry and had to fly out the door to bus again. Pat wanted me in the shop yet after school and I had no idea what supper was gonna be. I grabbed steaks out of the freezer and thawed them while I worked outside. Supper wasn't even cleaned up and Wyatt was asking for a program. I helped him plan it and as soon as all the lunches were made it commenced. Wyatt sang Jesus Loves Me as a solo. He was also chairman. Zach sat and rolled his eyes, his one leg draped nonchalantly over the armrest of the couch. (You know I'm not exactly proud of this behaviour.) Colby and Pat had a duet, There's a Hole in the Bottom of the Sea, only Colby didn't sing and Pat laughed. I read a chapter of Little House on the Prairie. It's worth remembering.


Some facts:

• I want to learn to write better.
• I don't have time to edit.
• I don't really have time for anything these days.
• I'm not keeping up with basic cooking and cleaning and how do I validate writing?
• I want to learn to write the in proper tenses. It's very important to me to use the right to/two/too and their/they're and write/right.
• One of the biggest things I learned in my writing class with Dena was about writing in the passive or aggressive voice.

I have a question. Is it better to write something that's badly written or write nothing at all?

Oct 30th - A project you're working on.

Well, here’s the thing. One project I’ve been working on has morphed into quite a few projects. It all started with thinking about my mom coming for Christmas. If my mom came for Christmas I would really like to get the bed frame back in my guest room so that mom doesn’t have to sleep on the floor. I mean, if we have the bed frame, why not.

And if I’m going to set up the bed frame it just does not make sense that I wouldn’t paint it first. So, I hauled the pieces out to the shop and gave the bed frame three coats of Annie Sloan chalk paint. Next, I’m going to clear coat it.

But in the mean time, I got to thinking, that if per chance we would actually be putting the bed back together in the guest room and this ginormous bed frame is probably not going to be moving for a long time, I would need to finish the trim first and put it up.

So, out to the shop with the trim and I gave it all three coats of shiny white trim paint. And in the midst of it all, my mind a whirling, I got to thinking about putting the trim up and the gouges and places where the paint pulled off in the guest room when everything was wet and flooded this summer.

So, I hauled out the paint pails and the mud and spatula and sander and started filling holes. It doesn’t take much when a person gets going and I’ll admit, I went a little wild with hole filling.

At the end of the day, Pat came in to mud spots in the dining room, all the way down the stairs and the main full wall of the basement. He seemed a little surprised and not exactly interested in the whole process, a little afraid, I think, that he would be roped in to help. But do not worry, midnight is my hour.

And today, at this point in my life, my dining room and basement look nice and new and put together. I need to get a little tin of paint to touch up the lighter stripes in the guest room - White Truffle by Behr. And today I hope to clear coat the bed and staple in trim.

And perhaps this is why my projects seem to take forever.

The end.

Oct 28th - Bible Verse

Oct 27th - 50 Words To Describe Your Day

sunshine

maple bugs

babysitting Keziah

baked oatmeal and

baked eggs for lunch

jumping on the tramp

Lego everywhere

reading stories

word-of-the-week

people opting out

preparing for

Villa pizza night 

barbecue chicken pizza

apple crisp and ice cream

red disposable cups

song books and games

clean the bathroom

vacuum floors

coffee

Oct 26th - Words of Wisdom {when times get tough}

Hmm. I don't know if I have any wisdom at all but I've had a tough time or two in my life. Seems like the older I get the less wisdom I have! One thing that my mom used to say when we were little was It'll all feel better in the morning. Isn't that the truth?


And something that always comes back to me is what Arnie & Mel's Grandma Klassen used to say. Drink lots of water and rest and get fresh air. Isn't that just a good way to calm down and smell the roses?


I think we all pray and sing and read the bible and have devotions and those are wonderful things. Another good thing to do is write down things I'm thankful for, specific things that bring joy or are beautiful.


And it all depends what kind of tough we're going through, but I believe that our physical, spiritual and mental health is all intertwined and a good multi vitamin is always a safe helpful thing.


Be happy. Laugh. Read something humorous. Dance with the little kids. Sing loudly in the shower. Learn a new skill. Think of others. Give your time to a good cause. Take a nap. Have a bubble bath. Give in. Exercise. Time yourself and do the dirty work - ten minutes does wonders. Let out the bad in a safe place and let it go.


In acceptance there is peace.

Oct 25th - Cleaning

So cleaning isn't my most favourite thing to do but I must admit that I am a little bit particular in this area. I don't ever do a huge fall or spring cleaning and clean my house in a week. For many years I've done, like, one or two rooms a week and tried to get through my house in a month. I spot clean and dust and clean bathrooms and vacuum daily.


But I never feel like I'm on top of the world for cleaning. My dear mother-in-law is the world's cleanest lady and I never measure up. She never makes me feel that way, it's my own interpretation. But when she came over to help me set up for a Christmas business party one year she came in with stuff to spot clean my carpet. And I was just thinking about enough food and chairs at that stage of the game. That just tells you how different we all are.


Sometimes I come home and see my house through different eyes and usually I think, Hey, it's not too bad in here! I think my biggest thing that makes me feel like things are messy and dirty is disorganization. Little piles of this and that sitting around drive me completely batty. I do definitely have zones that get hit bad but there's nothing quite like the feeling of totally cleaned off countertops and a place for everything and everything in it's place.


I am fiercely choleric and a lot of melancholy on this subject. I would nine times out of ten do a quick job and not necessarily a perfect job of cleaning. Also, I would almost always choose a way that to me looks appealing and spend a little bit more time on looks than making sure every crack and crevice is spotless. One thing I do love is clean windows and I'll do many quick window cleanings during summer on my front windows and my main lived in rooms. But I'm doing good to get my bedroom windows cleaned twice a year, partly because they're way up and hard to reach.


I obsess about cleaning garbage up off the yard and making sure the grass stays green and edging beds and trees and spraying weeds. And parking things in rows and lining things up and stuff. Now doesn't that sound almost like an obsessive compulsive confession? And I'm tremendously bossy and get all my men to help me with it all. But really, Pat is always supportive of the tidying and cleaning and the boys helping. I think we've both thought that everyone is happier if they help out. And Pat himself is fiercely particular about looks and cleanliness and so is his family. And perhaps, that is partly why it's important to me too. Whew.


So many confessions. Who would've guessed that was all waiting to escape the pen?


I'm not going back to edit. All I ask is that you'll still be my friend! ;)

Oct 24th - Favourite Person/People to Call for a Mood Lift

First I call my mither-mother

Then I call my sister B

Next I call my sister Karen

Then I call my sis Penny

 

After that I call to Jodi

Ruby, Viv and Lana too

Char and Lisa, Pam and Kim

Talk to Pat for change of view

 

Then I call my neighbour Heather

Melanie Miranda Am

Maybe I should talk to Cindy

Just depends how busy I am

 

Prob’ly time to whatsapp school friends

Arnie, Mel, Lur, Lila, Eif

Rose and Jane, Ters, Sharon, Marva

Bev n Allison, It’s the life!

 

But most of all my time spent talking

Is focused on a certain few

It’s my family, Colb, Zach, Wyatt

Pat’s the favourite in view.

 

Along the way, I’ve learned to curb it

Somewhat keep the thoughts subdued.

But if I really need to dump it

Guess Who hears me through and through?

Oct 23rd - Things that are causing you stress.

So the thing that stresses me the most I think is the responsibilities.


Honestly. That sounds crazy. But on the flip side, I'm so very grateful for a faithful husband. We have way too many spiritual widows around here and this is the thing that goes with it. We have way too many 'thangs' to do!! Gah.


There you have it.


So what stresses you?

Oct 21st - A song

Just as I am - I Come Broken


Just as I am without one plea but that Thy blood was shed for me
And that Thou bidst me come to Thee, O Lamb of God I come, I come.


Just as I am and waiting not to rid my soul of one dark blot,
To Thee whose blood can cleanse each spot, O Lamb of God I come, I come.


Chorus:
I come broken to be mended. I come wounded to be healed.
I come des'prate to be rescued. I come empty to be filled.
I come guilty to be pardoned, by the blood of Christ, the Lamb,
And I'm welcomed with open arms, praise God, just as I am.


Just as I am I would be lost, but mercy and grace my freedom bought.
And now to glory in Your cross, O Lamb of God I come, I come.


Chorus:
I come broken to be mended. I come wounded to be healed.
I come des'prate to be rescued. I come empty to be filled.
I come guilty to be pardoned, by the blood of Christ, the Lamb.
And I'm welcomed with open arms, praise God, just as I am.


I come broken to be mended. I come wounded to be healed.
I come des'prate to be rescued. I come empty to be filled.
I come guilty to be pardoned, by the blood of Christ, the Lamb.
And I'm welcomed with open arms, praise God, just as I am.
Praise God, just as I am.


~ ~ ~ ~ ~
I heard my baby singing this song the other day while he played. And my throat felt tight.


It's a favourite of mine.

Oct 18th-20th Nonsense, Change a Room and Where's the Coffee???

So, it's a three-meal-deal in one, my friends.


First the nonsense. It's been crazy, Grandma-Dora-ish around here. Just random things like moving office stuff into the new office, finishing painting, our first sewing of the season, finding cooks for the Villa, dentist appointments, filing GST, PST, payroll deductions, etc. It's this grand dance I call my wonderful life. I send one boy off to work at the chicken barn one or two days a week and to his uncles welding shop another day or two a week. I send another boy off to school by himself. And the littlest one, oh, the littlest one. He keeps us all on course.


Of course, I'm dreaming of changing up my kitchen. It's for one person, square, with the tight little walkway going right through it. I picked it out as a young bride of 20, with no inkling whatsoever of what I'd like in a kitchen. It's the oak look of the 90's which is turning orange in it's age. It had a lowered ceiling which we removed a few years ago but it still sports a fancy scallop border above the window. That would be one of the main things I would like to remove. Then I would paint it white-white-white and get long straight black handles to match my laundry room and do new countertops the same as my laundry room as well, huge marble-look laminate. I think some white subway tile or little white hex tile or something for a backsplash would finish it off. Then I'd add the bright splashy colors that I love, like a huge blue and green plate displayed in one corner and my aqua box Colby built me in school that houses my prolific stack of cookbooks.


And coffee? I love a good coffee and I'm a little picky about it. Of course, I would enjoy any coffee you served and friendship is definitely more important to me than coffee. But. BUT. Fresh ground coffee beans cannot be beat. I love French press coffee and a nice glug of rich cream. I love flavored coffees but I'll skip on flavored creamers and sugar. And this all being said about coffee, I really love a good cup of tea and my sister Penny beats all in making tea. Hers is THEE very best. And so, coffee in the early morning, chai tea in the late morning, some flavored healthy THM tea in the afternoon and maybe a sleepy time tea before bed. It's all good.

Oct 17th - A project you're dreaming of doing.

I'm going to write a list of all some of the projects!

• Paint shop lunchroom, office, bathroom.
• Paint guest bed frame - ugh, yes, it's still waiting patiently in the garage.
• Dream up a quilt pattern for the browns, greens, oranges, greys that the sewing ladies sent home with me today.
• Build a narrow tall table to fit the exact spot I need in my entrance. I've been dreaming about this one for a long time. I think I'll do the X on the end like I got the boys to do on the one in my dining room. Painted white, of course.

Oct 16th - Seasons

Tis the season for:

• painting the shop office, lunchroom and washroom
• leaves flying
• fields of geese (having church, like Wyatt says)
• first sewing day this fall
• pumpkin spice everything
• my oldest boy getting offered jobs here and there and ever so far away
• braces almost done
• maple bugs and flies in excess
• cleaning windows and walls
• Villa fall cleaning
• used book sale in Saskatoon
• quilt fabric pulled and no time to sew

Oct 14th - A recipe

Helloo, dear friends,


Today is my mither-mother's birthday. And I love her. And I'm going to join my sis, the Q-mom in a party at the Long Bar Ranch. So, here goes. This is what I'm going to bring.


Layered Ranchera Bean Dip


Find your prettiest fall platter. I like my huge dark red leaf one. Open 2 tins of refried beans with mild chilies and spread them evenly over the platter, leaving at least one inch around the edges for pretty. Now mix up 1 cup sour cream and 1 cup mayonnaise and about a tablespoon of taco seasoning. Spread over the bean layer. Next, mash up 3 or 4 avocados with a dash of lime juice and spread or clump over the sour cream layer, spreading as best you can with a fork. Next, sprinkle lots of shredded cheddar cheese over, maybe around 3 cups. From here you can go two different directions, hot or cold. I'm doing it cold today. So just before serving chop up one large tomato and sprinkle over the top. Then crack open a tin of sliced black olives and sprinkle maybe half of them over the top. Serve with plain taco chips. This is pretty and huge (feeds a crowd) and is a little dangerous for the hips.


Enjoy!

Oct 13th - little moments that you love

• Wyatt sitting on my lap while I'm relaxing in my chair.
• Saskatchewan sunrises and sunsets
• Clean counter tops and a candle lit
• My bed made and our room tidy, blinds up
• The smell of laundry taken off the line

Oct 12th - Your go-to place for alone time.

• My garden - nobody wants to weed garden with me, except, occasionally Wyatt will choose to help. I love being by myself in my garden. It's surrounded by trees and at times deer.
• My bedroom - shut and lock the door. Even for a little bit helps.
• And this past week I hung out by myself in the shop bathroom and office and painted and painted and painted. Truly, alone time, if I ever was longing for it. I did get a little lonesome.

Oct 11th - Countries I've visited or want to visit.

I've been blessed to get to a couple countries already in my life. Long ago, when we were first married we left our little boys and went to Belize to visit Jerry & Dawn Baerg. I think that was my first impression of a foreign country with the open markets and little food booths along the roads. We went with Jerry's on a little holiday to Caye Calker, a little island belonging to Belize. We took a snorkeling tour and touched the stingray and ate banana-apples together.


One year we took a trip with Pat's folks to Romania where we got to meet Vila and Lee. We rode a train, toured an old castle, visited an orphanage and shopped the markets. We ate delicious lasagna at Lee's and stood on their little porch that slanted down in a shocking manner many stories up in their apartment. Best of all, we made life long friends.


Then we took a trip of a lifetime to China to visit Ryan & Arlene and their family. Aunty Cheri came with us and we toured the world's largest building in Chengdu, and the huge fabric market where they sell rolls of 120" wide fabric for a song, and visited a Chinese zoo. We ate hot pot with rabbit meat and one lone cockroach plus many more foods of various standing. We were carefully watched and attended to by the natives and guards and people all around us. In the crowded elevator in one hospital Maddy screamed with terror when she came face to face with a live chicken in a gunny sack. We ate with chopsticks and stood in groups while people freely took pictures and I even had the privilege of escorting a rat between my feet at supper one evening. We watched the lights light up the skyscrapers at night and watched the Chinese ladies dance in the evening along the river and shopped the underground Wal-Mart in Leshan. Pat and Colby even got to visit the leprosy village way up a mountain.


I dream of traveling more. As a child I went to the Northwest Territories with my family and Pat & I have done Niagara Falls and PEI but I dream of taking our boys these places. I dream of touring the Yukon and Northwest Territories and Alaska with our boys. I dream of traveling the States in one long drawn out trip. I dream of Europe in general and particularly Paris. But mostly I'm very grateful for the traveling I've done and the memories I have.

Oct 10th - Your current favourite time of day.

Maybe the best time of day
is the morning chill and quiet
and darkness lingers
cozy and still
and my eyes don't open
so I say a prayer
of thanksgiving and joy and peace
and I wiggle my toes
and cuddle deeper into my
fluffy white blanket.


Or maybe the best time of day
is mid morning, still and quiet
when Wyatt runs out to the shop
for coffee-break with his dad
and my kitchen cupboards are clean
and the dishwasher is humming
and a load of towels on the line
swings in the autumn breeze
and I make myself a cup of
piping hot chai tea in a
chunky mug.


Or maybe the best time of day
is early afternoon when the sun
shines brightly in the spiffy west window
and the leaves dance on the new mown grass
and the window washing supplies
lie ready to be picked up again
and the fridge holds warm leftovers from lunch
and the bills are paid
and the pinto beans are stacked neatly in
the small toy trailer on the table.


Or maybe the best time of day
is late late afternoon
when the table is set for supper
and yummy smells permeate the house
and the doors slam
and the taps run
and chatter and noise is everywhere.


Or maybe the best time of day
is evening, solid and still
when tall boys put their feet on the
couch while they read
and the vacuum hose is neatly
coiled in the closet
and the lamps are on
and the sun is long set.

Oct 9th - The story behind a plate/quilt/family heirloom.

I have a plate almost identical to this one hanging on my dining room wall. It's been passed down through the ages to the second son in every family. My dad was the second son in his family but my Grandma chose to give it to me because it's both Pat's and my heritage. My plate writing on the back that says


Brought from Russia by Grandma Giesbrecht's Grandparents Henry Esau's 1874


I love it.


I miss my Grandma.


I miss my dad.

Oct 8th - Your latest answer to prayer.

A few weeks ago I was in town with my sister, Bren. We stopped at Staples before we met our friends, Tami, Deana, Grace and their mom, Val, for lunch at The Chopped Leaf. When Bren and I ran out of Staples my phone dropped on the ground beside my van. Fortunately, I have a cover to protect my phone and all was well. Sitting and having lunch a while later, my phone started beeping a funny beep. I looked at it and here my stylus was missing. I searched my purse; searched all over. I decided to leave it and look in the van, though it did seem mysterious. All of a sudden it hit me. My stylus will have popped out when my phone dropped in front of Staples. I prayed that it would still be there and enjoyed the rest of my meal and our time together as friends. Bren and I drove straight back to Staples when we were done and right there, in the same spot my phone dropped, was my white stylus. God is so very great. Even in these little things.

Oct 7th - A quote

Oct 6th - Favourite items in your home.

• My black leather rocking recliner. It makes me happy. I write most of what I write from here.
• Cozy blankets. I have a wicker basket filled with blankets by my rocker and fireplace year round.
• My favourite (or one of my favourite) coffee mugs is black and white striped with huge pink flowers and in gold writing says Hello Lovely. It's gifted to me by one of my favourite little girls, Brianna Jo, made even more special because she picked it out for me herself.
• Lamps and candles.
• Stacks of pillows in colourful array.
• Books and books and more books.

Oct 5th - Whatever spills out at the moment.

{WW} pink

 

My Not-So-Pink Life

 

Jeans drying on the wash-line

Guns, bows, planes and go-carts

Lego, Lincoln Logs, Meccano

Fidget spinners blown up to see how they work

Dead magpies and coyotes

Mashed potatoes and gravy

Batteries, knives and flashlights

Cabela’s catalogues

Haircuts

Unicycles, bikes, balancing wheels

Forklift rides, old vehicles

Cranes and skid-steers and backhoes

Blown up pop bottles

Acetylene explosions

Peterbilts and chevy’s and engines

Gas, tires, patches, crazyglue

Whole batches of cookies devoured in one setting

Burping contests

Boats, tents, fires

Porcupine quill collections

Axe deodorant and razors

Bats, balls, volleyballs, hockey pucks and sticks

Corners full of books, empty granola bar wrappers

Flat brimmed hats and toques and old gloves

Coveralls hung only to dry

Shelves filled with deer sheds

Wrestling, whistling and whittling

Slingshots, glueguns, popguns

Paper airplanes

Walking on hands contests

Cowboys and Indian

Shrink-wrap, ropes and chains

Oct 4th - Something you've accomplished lately.

So my latest accomplishment is to accept four coyote paws abiding in my freezer. There's a bounty on coyotes now. I cried and then I laughed. Please don't judge.

Oct 3rd - Give the highlights of your last trip.

 This is Maligne Canyon in Jasper, curtesy of Albertawow.com. Words can hardly do justice and neither can pictures. This beautiful spot is hot on a summer day and cools down to shivery cold as you hike the five kilometres down to the bottom. There is nothing to explain the grand awe and majesty of God's glorious mountains. I came home with my heart full to the brim and overflowing.


We took a ten day trip this summer to Bill & Penny in Quesnel, B.C. and Jerry & Karen in Creston, B.C. This is a trip we've hoped to do for a long time so it was extra special.


One day we went with Bill & Penny to Barkerville, a revived gold mining town. It was full of actors and actresses and everything from bygone days came to life again. That was especially special to me because my dad took our family there when I was little. We went to church in Quesnel, met Bill's friends, had Sunday lunch with old friends, toured Penny's lovely yard and just loved being together. Penny and I even got a little bit of sister time together, shopping and going for chai lattes to the neatest little joint town. Bill took the men touring down by the river and the boys went gold-panning. Kajsa had a little sidekick named Wyatt Benjamin.


On our way out we stopped at the Ancient Forest where huge old cedar trees grow. It was just breathtaking, the lush undergrowth and flowing creek and the walk. One thing I probably won't forget is Zach walking most of that hiking trail on the wooden handrails. We set up our tent in Jasper at a beautiful little spot by a splashing dashing river. We shopped little souvenir shops in the town of Jasper and bought a couple groceries for a picnic by Maligne Canyon. We toured Lake Louise and Athabaska Falls and Johnston's Canyon and many other little spots along the way.


We stopped in Radium for night on our way to Jerry's at little hick joint. We ate funny food from a little grocery store and trail mix from Costco and chips from a tiny little service station where the man asked many questions and told us where to find the best coffee and where to drive down to the local river beach. We toured way out to Lussier Hot Springs (still too many people for our liking), down a long gravel road with many hairpins and drop-offs and wonderful camping spots.


We had a wonderful time with Jerry's. They went all out of their way for Zach's 13th birthday, including a Dairy Queen icecream cake. The men and older children went zip-lining on the Kokanee Mountain Zipline while Karen and Wyatt and I talked and waited. We toured an ancient forest with the hugest tree I've ever seen in my life. It took eight of us, fingertip to fingertip, to reach around the biggest one. That gorgeous mountainside we walked with them was luscious with ferny undergrowth, gigantic rocks covered in moss and the most beautiful stream bouncing and singing and praising its way downhill. We picnicked for supper one night, rode the ferry, had supper with Carl & Teresa and Danny & Marcie, shopped the local market, ate fresh fruit from the road-stands and swam in Jerry's lovely pool.


On our way home we watched a for-real-and-true forest fire break forth before our eyes. We toured through Banff again on our way home, stopped in Calgary for night and then my man took me to Cross Iron Mills, a huge mall near Calgary. I came home so inspired, so full in heart, so thankful for my dear sisters. It was truly a trip of a lifetime.

Oct 2nd - Something on you bucket list.

Isn't it amazing how we can accomplish one thing in life, only to start planning and hoping for the next? The other day when I was teaching the grade fives and sixes I got them to write a list for me including 3 things they wanted to do or be when they grew up. I nearly cried when I read one little grade five boys list which included: I want to be a dad. This particular little boy is rather naughty and loud but I would say this one thought vouches for his home life. He wants to be a dad.


Bucket List for Jo

• watch my kids grow up
• sew a quilt-along
• start a coffee/fabric/quilting shop
• volunteer again in the hospital
• take a two or three week trip with our family driving through the United States
• take the boys to the east coast
• paint my kitchen cupboards
• spend a term as house-parents somewhere

Now that's a few things. I guess I'm not a sky-diver, bungee-jumping type of person. I have enough excitement in my life! :):)

Oct 1st - What does it mean to worship?

I'm not going to let myself read one word of sweet wisdom from my fellow bloggers until I've posted my own. So the truth is, I may not keep up. More truth, maybe I won't be the only one. Even more truth, I really want to. My beauty-hungry eyes are feasting on trees of yellow and russet and green against thick grass carpeted in leaves. My house is overrun with men. Young men who smell, like, well, young men. My oven is full of fresh chocolate chip cookies which will be devoured in the blink of an eye. My cup of steaming chai tea is long cooled off but my heart is full. I don't know what God means by giving me so much today but I'm going to take it as a blessing and hope for a nap in the near future.

What does it mean to worship What does it mean to worship? And they that worship me must worship me in spirit and in truth. I don’t know. There are so many ways to worship our Lord. Honoring our family, making them food without grumbling, taking time to admire nature and thank God for the beauty around us. Singing. Any thing that is beautiful and right and good is a form of worship. Resting. Prayer. Trust. Thoughts of thankfulness. Asking for wisdom. Honoring the church, the home, the people we’re given to love. Acceptance.

Of Algorithms and Work and Boyish Obsessions

As I said earlier, this has been the very best summer ever. For one thing, the boys worked almost every day. There has not been one bored day, not one. This is huge. Suddenly my oldest two are grown up. Wyatt spent hours and hours along the fence, watching the men building shop on our back yard.


The shop is up and starting to be used for some work, although the three-phase power still is not hooked up which means no welding yet.


One thing Zach got into this summer was the Rubiks cube. Tristan, Wendel & Sharon's son, got him going on it when they were out this summer. It took him about a week and now he can solve it in a minute (shortest time). He used his money from Grandma Isaac for his birthday to buy a fancy fast Rubiks cube. We feel like it's a good thing for him to focus his mind and energy into things that are not harmful and take thinking and perseverance. The other day his face was lit up and he was telling me which algorithms he uses to solve the Rubiks cube. I listened and when he ran out again, I looked up the word algorithm. This motherhood thing is truly over my head sometimes.


And talking about work, Colby has worked part time for a few weeks now for Carlin Toews, in his chicken barns. The shocking thing is that he can arise before 6am to leave for work. It used to be such a struggle to get out of bed for school... And this morning he was up by 7am, ready to go hunting.


Which leads me to Colby's obsession. It's hunting season. Every spare minute is spent perusing Cabela's online and adjusting his compound bow and target practicing. Not to mention the hours and hours he spends in his camo clothes, walking the home quarters with binoculars in hand. He's a naturally quiet person and he manages to find the little hidden animals and hiding places the rest of us miss completely. For example, this spring he found a tiny little Bambi hidden carefully in the trees behind our garden. It was so very adorable with big blinking eyes (the only part of the baby that moved) and huge baby spots on its back. I've never seen a baby deer that close and the next morning it had vanished, hopefully safely with its mother. Also, he found a duck nest in the tall grass under the trees which he watched carefully and came in with a new egg count every day. One day at the beginning of bow season, Colby had his friend Gilwyn over to go hunting with him. They spent almost all day together in the great outdoors. So far, there are no new venison roasts in my freezer but I'm waiting for them.


Of course, Zach is in school again, which is new for him to go alone. He's in a grade by himself this year and feels a little lonely at times. He devours books. Whole sets of books. He's working through Eric Walters books right now. Do you all have good ideas for books for him?

{WW} relief

{WW} relief

The elevators at Royal University Hospital were crowded that warm July day. I squeezed on, holding my purse and lunch-kit and pressed the button for fourth floor. My little 3-day-old baby was waiting for me in the neonatal unit, his little skinny legs pulled up against his body. One good thing about being postpartum six weeks early was the part of fitting into pre-pregnancy clothes, beings as I tend to gain my allotted thirty pounds in the last three months.

“Hey, I’d give you a hundred bucks for that good Mennonite cooking in there.”

My mind suddenly registered fifteen faces around me, looking at me, smiling. The elevator was crowded. A man in a hospital gown, attached to an IV, stood at the back of the elevator grinning at me.

“Uh… probably not,” I stammered. I was the only Mennonite on board.

“Come on!” he persisted. “I’d give you a hundred bucks for that good Mennonite cooking in there!”

I looked at the elevator lights, willing it to go faster. How would I explain this Mennonite cooking?

My face flamed. “No… it’s probably not something you’d like,” I answered.

“On, come on. You know what kind of cooking we get here,” the man said.

All eyes were on me, when with relief I saw the elevator doors open at fourth floor. “It’s actually breast milk for my baby,” I said, stepping off with my head held high.

The elevator erupted in laughter behind me and I heard the man, in a little quieter voice, say, “I’d still give you twenty…”

{WW} too many

There are never too many

 

Jeans drying on the line

Hearts talks with the boys

Quiet hours by myself

Stories read aloud

Special meals with family

Evenings in the heated pool

Pumpkin spice lattes

Little voices singing

Sunrises to watch

Picnics at the lake

Corn roasts

Cool evenings around the fire

Cozy throws and quilts

Stacks of books

Laughing children

Prayers as a family

 

(Sept 12/17)

Jo Esau

{WW} news

{WW} News

 

There is something so very splendid and exciting about the word news. I love to hear about a new baby, that company is coming or that some prayer has been answered. I love to hear about weddings and trips and gardens and books. I love to hear about your work and dreams, your thoughts and fears.

 

Very definitely, news can be terrifying and heart-stopping, as well. I’ll never forget my pounding heart, when as a teenager my mom woke me up at midnight and said my best friend, Char, wanted to talk to me. Her dad had died. The long drive to her house, by myself with all my stuff hastily thrown into a bag on the passenger seat is forever etched into my mind. Also, the memory of the six-in-the-morning call on Easter Monday, 2000, will always bring a small stab of pain. Gord and Adrian were missing.

 

Some news is so life changing and good and scary all at the same time. Like the phone call I got from my mom the day before my school year of teaching was done. Mom said her and dad wanted to meet me for supper in Grande Prairie and it didn’t matter if I missed singing with the youth in Hythe once again. I was literally sick that time. I will always hold dear the picture of my dad leaning against his pickup, grinning at me, as I drove into the restaurant parking lot. I jumped out of my little two-door cavalier and ran to my dad and hugged him. “Is it what I want?” I asked with tears in my eyes. My dad hugged me and said, “Yes, it’s what you want.”

 

Each baby has brought the same scary, good, life-changing feeling of news but I especially will always remember finding out about our last baby. Our boys were 8 and 10 and we had long given up on having any more children and it was tough. When I missed my period my first thought was cancer. I really wondered what was going on. By the time I was six weeks along I felt a little nauseous and I truly thought this must be the end. I did not let myself once think that I could be pregnant. We’d had too many disappointments. We were school board at the time and the day of yearend I was so exhausted. I went home to get something and ended up taking a two hour nap with no plans of any such thing. It was time to look into this. I booked an appointment at my doctor, going by myself and telling Pat I’d let him know if it was serious. When the doctor came into my room and told me the pregnancy test was positive, I was stunned into silence.

 

I suppose, no matter where we go and what we do, changes will come to us; news of weddings and babies and baptisms and ordinations. There will be deaths and hard times and sadness and grief. But there will be peace and God, through it all, if we are His.

Company and August

There are big juicy freestone peaches sit on my counter, one box is left on the floor to fully ripen and there are rows of pretty jars in my pantry filled with peaches. It's the best time of year. Very much so.


It's also the time of year for company. And girls, we are so blessed with friends! I'm truly so very grateful for each one. Jeff & Deli were one of the many who have come through in August and that was really neat. We've written together for so long that it feels like we know each other but I'll admit I was a little terrified to actually meet in person.


Deli is tall and slim and fun-loving. She is so easy to be with. We talked and talked and talked. Straight time. And it just wasn't long enough. Of course, I loved meeting her beautiful girls and her busy little boy and her relaxed Kansas man. It was just so good. I am very blessed to have so many friends.


More friends that came through were Russ & Tracy Klassen, Wes & Kim Schartner, Duane & Geri Isaac, Wendel & Sharon Toews and Arlene Hildebrand & boys. One day Bren and I met our old friends, Deana, Tami and Grace and their mom, Val, for lunch in Saskatoon. In between we've danced the end-of-summer dance of an evening out in Wendel's pasture, supper around the fire at Rudi's, a big 40th birthday bash for Miranda, supper at Pike Lake with Bob & Jo and many many more.


It's like taking a long ride on the merry-go-round and when it's over we say, "Whew! That was fun!"


Today is a first day for a long time that we're home by ourselves. I napped. Wyatt napped. We've all relaxed. It's been great. And this week school starts. It's exciting and sort of sad to actually be facing fall and September. For sure in our dear north country where the nights are so chilly and the leaves are turning color. It's time to think pretty fall boots and leggings and scarves. It's time to sit on the deck with our hands around steaming cups of coffee, dreaming and planning for winter.

Of trips and life and home.

You know the feeling of coming home from a long trip and you're just inspired to organize and clean and love your house to bits? Well, that's me this week. We got home on Monday from visiting Bill & Penny in Quesnel and Jerry & Karen in Creston. In between we drove through Banff and Jasper and toured and camped (one night). Banff and Jasper were gorgeous, as always. But full!! Yikes, the 150 anniversary must have brought the crowds in. There were literally NO CAMPSITES left in the whole park of Banff for our second night so we toured on down to Radium instead.


Being with my sisters was the best. Each of their families really outdid themselves with taking care of us and having fun together. We LOVED it! A gigantic thanks, sistas.


And now home is home. My beans are ready to pick. I ran for groceries yesterday and took Wyatt to the eye doctor. Good news, all is well. He is a little more farsighted in one eye and that could be why he held one eye open on our trip, but he doesn't need glasses. So that's taken care of. And the days have just the tiniest hint of fall here. The crickets are chirping, the nights are colder, and the other day I heard geese flying over. Oh, my heart. I never like to let our lovely summers go...


And it's the season for company! I'm so excited that Tracy and Russ are planning on coming out this next weekend. And next week we're expecting Jeff & Deli and Wes & Kim! The very most unfortunate thing happened while we were gone. My lovely finally-finished guest room flooded. We came home to a horrendous stench in the house even though folks were trying to dry it out. We decided to rip out the carpet and hopefully dry it that way. It's improved vastly, but the whole thing does seem to pose a small issue on the company topic. We are just so very grateful it was not worse. (My soaker hose got left on in front of the house for five days. Eek.)


So, yes, the day is unfurling around me with sunlight dappling through willow and spruce. The sky is a promising clear blue with tiny white clouds above. I love our wide open prairies for the sky-scapes we get.


I'm off for some coffee and eggs.

A Wedding and Wyatt

I'm sitting by my table, my coffee and eggs sitting quietly beside, my fingers frozen from the chill of night and open windows, quickly writing. I see sunshine against spruce trees and blooming canola and directly in front of me, my almost blooming hydrangea. I so love this time of year. I love the green grass and long warm days.


So we just got home from Korwin & Raquel's wedding in Swan River. It was a quick, fun weekend. And a huge wedding. We stayed at Chris & Kimbre for night and our boys loved it. Wyatt and their little Bria played and played and played. She's such a little sweetheart. And Wyatt is such a little case. He never ceases to amaze me. He LOVES people. He loves meeting everyone of all ages and isn't one bit afraid of girls of any age. Eek. What have we on our hands. On our way home our older boys laughed until they cried about Wyatt walking around with some girl I had never met, holding hands and best of friends. I found out later she's Mark & Rachelle's 14year old. He'll happily go to any group of people and put out his hand and say, "Hi, my name is Wyatt." Maybe the most amazing thing is how everyone loves him. Dear friends and people, there are times I'm embarrassed too.


So, in other words, we're home for a few days. We're planning on heading out to B.C. to see Bill & Penny and Jerry & Karen, the Lord willing. Truly, with the fires and all, we haven't known if we should plan on going or if Bill's would be evacuating or what. But as of today, we hope to go. That means more jeans for Colby, new trunks for some, food for the trip and such stuff. Pat & I were hoping to run in to town for a special supper for our anniversary too, maybe. So many thangs. So many blessings.


Another thing, in my multifaceted life, is that Chris Boese has been painting here the last week, just a couple hours here and there. She is so good; painting is her forte. And I love having a girl and friend around to yack with. She painted Zach's room a medium grey (this is all his choice) with a wide lime stripe at an angle down the wall under his window, then two smaller and different widths of stripes in charcoal on either side. It looks really sharp. And she did Wyatt's room just a light almost blue-y grey. I've been dreaming of that one for years. It's a huge improvement over the black and red I painted before we ever dreampt of him joining our family. So ya. Good stuff. And since I'm on a painting kick, the lime bathroom awaits a transformation and so does our master bedroom. Why aim for the stars when there are whole galaxies out there?


Can you tell what I've been reading by how I write? I just finished L.M. Montgomery's first set of diaries. Wow. Just wow. I loved it. I felt validated. I felt sorry for her and yet caught such a glimpse into the real 'her'. So many of her books and stories are taken from her own experiences, which just does my heart good. Anyway, do you all order books from the library? I do. Because I don't like to pay for anything I don't have to. And there's so much available through the libraries. I just ordered her next four diaries. It might be heavy reading for some but if you're ever interested in her life, I'd definitely recommend them. One thing, when she was fifteen she came to Saskatchewan, Prince Albert, to live with her dad and stepmom for a year. I LOVED reading her view of the prairies.


Oopsies. Now my eggs are cold. Wyatt is up. The day awaits. I've been invited to Linda's for coffee for Ruby's birthday. I'm going to putter with my beloved flowers and maybe spend time in my sanctuary (my garden) pulling weeds. And if it suits Pat, we'll fly off to town for a while too.


Enjoy your day!!

Growth & Validation

So it's been a journey, the last year or so. A journey of growth and peace and joy. I don't deserve it and I'm not sure how to explain it even but so much has changed since some of our family moved away. things are going so good with folks and Jeffs and us. We have so much fun together and it feels like we can get to know each other in a genuine peaceful way. It's just been so so good. It's not only that though...


And ya.


Maybe physically things have improved as well. I've been on the exercise bandwagon. And I take copious amounts of liquid vitamin D. I need to take it faithfully every day but I'm to the place that I'm relaxed. I can tell if I need vitamin D. Like, one lady told me you know you need a little extra vitamin D if you're braking on the passenger side when your husband is driving! Yes. Totally. I get this. And much as I hate to admit it, sugar makes me foggy brained. So yup. All things physical.


But vitamin D falls under mental health as well. And I have two things I've been doing for mental health.

• be thankful
• wish people well, including praying that they will be blessed

But isn't that spiritual health as well? And so it's all intertwined. And spiritually, I've been reading Streams In The Desert. I love the depth of that book. I feel pressed closer and closer. I feel peaceful and loved. I feel strength upholding me that is not my own. I feel blessed beyond comprehension. I have so very very much.


It helps that my hubby is so supportive. He's the best. And our little and big men growing so fine and strong are a boost to me as well.


So thanks for listening as I bare my soul. ;)


May you be blessed in your journey. :) :)

Life & Feelings

And then one morning she woke up and thought why not? Why not write again? Why not quickly chop half the group off and write again with freedom? This doesn't mean that I don't want people here. It means I'm sometimes afraid of the silence. In times past, I've merrily written things from my viewpoint only to have them passed on and I feel so vulnerable.


But I've taken a nice long break. And it hasn't only been that. My life has gone from full throttle to overdrive. I am in no way needing something to do with my time like I used to. (I know. I admitted that.) My older boys have so much going and happening and it's just different writing about them. I just have to respect them in a different way than a four year old. So maybe now I could write a little bit about some of the things.


Like, Colby graduated this year! Like, seriously, the whole thing took me by surprise. Forever and ever we've been doing homework and trying to get him to sing and just like that he was standing with his grade, singing The Open Road (nervously, no doubt). But he did it. I'll always have this picture of him in his black shirt with the red bits of trim, his dark jeans and canvas high tops. We couldn't see the emoji socks that the boys all wore, matching, but they smiled because of them. He will always be my quietest boy, with a shy smile that you know hides a lot on his beautiful face. (I'm the mom, forgive me.) He has so much love for wildlife and little children and people that are left out. He's loyal beyond his years. He's grown in leaps and bounds this last year, in the area of spiritual understanding and the depth makes me cry.


There are so many things I want to write down and remember but my 'moment' is swiftly coming to a close. Bren and I are doing a 40th birthday party for our men at Pike Lake this evening, about a hundred people. (And we used perfectpotluck.com to plan it.) Chris Boese has been painting for me and will be here in a couple minutes. Yesterday she painted Zach's room, a medium grey and then on one wall she's going to do a wide stripe at an angle in lime green and a narrower stripe in charcoal a little ways away. I have Wyatt's room and our main bathroom on the list yet too. So hopefully I can write an update on it all soon.


Thanks to my faithful family and friends for bearing with me.


Talk again soon.

{WW} time

You can’t take back moments, once you live them they’re gone… This song has been going through my mind ever since I got the word for this week. It’s the song our family walked out on at my dad’s funeral. It’s a song full of meaning and emotion for me. And it’s a good reminder to live in the moment, enjoy each gift of the day and thank God.

• Listening to Alison, Jaxon and Wyatt jumping on the tramp, laughing and talking.
• Wyatt proudly showing his ‘flower’ to anyone who will look and listen. It’s from Miss Audrey at the greenhouse just down the road and it’s going to get this tall! (lifts hand to his chest emphatically)
• My favourite brown thrasher singing his heart out.
• Wyatt pointing out a cloud that looked like above my coffee cup – sure enough a perfect steam picture.
• PW’s drip beef cooking in the crockpot.
• The look in Zach’s eyes as he explains to me how many hours he needs to work on the new shop this month yet to save up for his puppy/horse/quad/whatever he is currently dreaming about.
• Combing Colby’s hair for ticks… he’s so grown up, there’s not much I do for him anymore.
• Shopping grad shirts and jeans and shoes. He asks for so little when it comes to clothes and it’s a pleasure to hear his real thoughts.
• Wind blowing. I always think of time flying by and we can’t see it.

Just a couple lists...

To do

• till garden
• plant garden
• call Villa cooks about Frank
• finish mom's dress
• find shoes for Zach
• grad shopping on Friday with moms and grads
• yard cleanup and raking at the Villa with the youth
• pay Cobra bills
• clean office
• fertilize grass
• paint Zach's room

Thankful List

• happy four-year-old
• coffee on the deck on a warm morning with my MIL
• shopping greenhouse plants with MIL
• watching the baby great-horned owls
• raking and mowing
• sewing for others done for the season
• waking up to birds singing
• inspirations from Streams In The Desert
• cuddles on my big chair with Wyatt

A list from Zach about me...

• kind and loving
• likes to do fun stuff
• likes to camp
• likes to go to town and shop
• likes to play games with me
• likes to read out loud to us
• likes to picnic

{WW} spending

I’ve been thinking about my ever-present ‘book’, aka my family-planner (big scared-eyes here), aka my yearly calendar. This year I bought a planner book from Michael’s with the brand name of Create 365. I love it. Mostly. I probably will never be completely happy with a planner unless I’d design something myself but this is nice. One thing I really like about it is the colourful month pages with sayings and the ‘currently, right now, this month’ list. It doesn’t even have spending in the list like I thought. It has buying instead. But it’s so much fun to fill out each month and since this is my form of writing diary it’s just another added element. Here it is.

LOVING: Home…

EATING: cinnamon hearts

WATCHING: Snow blowing

GOING: to town, so very often…

READING: The Book Of Negroes – Yikes. If you like history…

TEXTING: my school-group 3-grade chat

PLAYING: boggle

CELEBRATING: birthdays! Bren’s 40^th, Steph’s 30^th, Wyatt’s 4^th, Melanie’s, Jodi’s, Jaxon’s, Jeff’s, Trevor’s, Char’s, Karen’s…

LISTENING: Taylor & Amber’s wedding (heart eyes)

BUYING: Groceries!!

PINNING: Tiffany’s baby quilt – I call it winter in Romania. It’s brightly coloured houses against a white background with blue sky. I pulled a Tiffany trick and put Very Bright birdies on the back.

PLANNING: Birthday parties, need I say more? (Is this necessary?)

VISITING: Folks, J now that they’re home again!

{WW} Highlight

{WW} Highlight

We’ve had a couple jam-packed weeks lately. So much so, that I’m not completely sure I’ve read all your articles. Which IS a big deal to a girl that loves to read. I thought I’d quick write the highlights of the last while and send you all a note. At least communicate, right?

So, it’s the year for me to help celebrate milestone birthdays. Steph’s 30^th was last Tuesday and I helped plan a supper at folks with a bunch of friends coming in the evening to surprise her. Wyatt turned four last Saturday and we celebrated with a big sledding party and wiener roast out in the community pasture close to us. Tomorrow is Bren’s 40^th birthday and my mother-dear is flying in tonight to help celebrate. We’re planning a ladies’ tea on Friday for Bren but we’re keeping it simple. Everyone is helping with food and the decorations will be a big bouquet of flowers from my mom.

In between we’ve had two school holidays, three town days, two shop days and one Sunday at home recovering. (Gotta make it sound as bad as it felt, eh?) I had one delightful ladies’ night out, another friend’s birthday coffee spur-of-the-moment and a couple lunches at folks when we’ve been working at the shop. We’ve had Villa stress and meetings and a finalized possession date for the shop. We’ve bused school children, picked up birthday Lego and thrown in a couple loads of laundry here and there, for modesty’s sake.

We’ve eaten cupcakes with green icing, charred hotdogs in frozen wiener buns with ketchup spilling down our chins, chili soup in our lunches and McDouble’s a few too many times. We had venison roast on Sunday with vast quantities of mashed potatoes, bought pizza out of the freezer after one shop day and porridge and scrambled eggs late Saturday night.

But there are some things I hold close and remember; watching my four-year-old fearlessly walk away from us to Sunday school for the first time, the grin on Zach’s face after I took him shopping, watching Colby’s arm muscles while he target-practices with bow and arrow.  

Please excuse me while I go tuck my boy in again and take that last pan of cookies out. And is it truly almost time to bus children again?

WW tingle

{WW} tingle

Wintry Bliss

Crunchy snow, boots and jackets

Snow-pants, toque and gloves and scarf

Trails with little childish footprints

Snow pile, ice trails, smells of fire

Cocoa steaming, tingling noses

Steamy breath and echoes clear

Happy voices, children’s laughter

Snowboards, saucers, sleds and gear

Slippery slopes, bright-eyed faces

Tumbling past the trees and banks

Best of years and best of seasons

Grateful prayers, thoughts of thanks

WW change

I don't usually write New Year's Resolutions or even pick a word for the year. I guess my life just happens. But I do so love the new year and the possibilities it brings. I love turning the calendar to a new page, sharpening a brand new pencil to a pointy tip, and starting anew with an untouched planner book.

I love to think about the year gone past and dream about the things I want to accomplish and finish in the coming year. I'm always full of grand ideas in the beginning of January and my book is full of lists. That doesn’t mean that all things come to fruition but I like to focus on what has.

Also, going ‘home’ for Christmas brings out my analytical side and I go back to the place that birthed me, the place I became who I am, with fond memories. So much has changed, but so much has not. I’ve gone full circle (maybe a few times) with accepting the changes, seeing the good here, seeing the good there, and just simply adjusting.

Really, my life is so much the same as always. I look out my window and watch the lazy snowflakes fluttering down. I sit by my cozy fireplace and watch the flames dancing while I drink my coffee. I have ten pairs of jeans drying on the upstairs railing and the heaters cranked out full blast to recompense for the -32C wind-chill. I have bread rising on the warm stovetop and toys littering the floor and clean laundry that needs folding.

Of course, some things are different as the new year starts. Colby is taller, has a lower voice and longer jeans. Zach is still a little boy in some ways but he’s going to be bigger than Colby, broader, maybe. And his mind goes a mile a minute, devouring whole series of books in one gulp, playing and collecting every imaginable game and he has enough tenacity to build a full sized skating rink of his own accord. And probably the biggest change is in Wyatt who is almost four instead of almost three.  I think you can start to tell how hard his father has worked on his choleric nature. He’s a man’s man. He’s three going on seventeen and knows a whole lot more than anyone in our household. Sometimes we sigh and sometimes we laugh and most of the time we try to focus on the future and where we’re heading with them all.

More changes in our life include Pat’s folks returning from their one-year stint in Windowrock, Pat selling the welding shop in Delisle with plans to build again here on our farm, and Trevor & Robins move to Ontario. These are all rather significant changes in our lives.

So today I sit, thankfully, prayerfully, with laughter welling and tears brimming, remembering and looking forward, accepting and holding tightly to the beautiful season of change I’m in.

Happy New Year!!

Hey! The best to you, my silent, quiet, screen friends! It's been a while.

So, what do we talk about first? Writing? I don't know where I want to go with this writing/blogging thing. Sometimes I think I'm ready to be done. It was fun to try for a while. I'll probably always blab, using the written word. But do I want to here? I love connecting with people... but I've spoken too freely, had stuff passed around the conference, deleted a bunch of readers, disconnected and lived my own life. And more.

So ya.

We had a wonderful Christmas. The best yet. We haven't gone home for the last two years so it was extra special to sit in the huge Crooked Creek church on Christmas day and listen to the beautiful youth Christmas program. I sat between Aunty Judy and Pam and had to ask who most of them were! Yes, I've lived in Swanson longer than I've lived anywhere else in my life. But Crooked Creek birthed me. Crooked Creek is my home. My stomping grounds. My people.

This year we had a grade party. Matt & Kendra didn't come and Allison & Justin couldn't make it. But it was absolutely delightful and healing and lovely and FUN to be together. I told mom that I didn't know when I had last been so Extremely loud. (And I wasn't the only one!) There is nothing like old friends to understand and validate you. There is no one else who you can immediately update on your family status. There is no one who so completely understands your past, your hurts, your accomplishments and grey hair. There is no one you can be as relaxed with as your old friend whose three-year-old teaches your three-year-old to climb the bookshelf and sit on the top.  And there's nothing in this world like fancy chai in fancy cups and lounging in a sewing room.

I didn't write a Christmas letter. I didn't do cards. I didn't even get past the pepper-nuts and party mixes for goodies. But this December was awesome. This last year has been up-building, healing. Like, after Trevor's moved away I've just decompressed and the air keeps whooshing out in big, belching plumes, like an air balloon settling on the earth after a long hard ride.

There is so much to learn in life, so many things to face, so much to let go of. And somewhere, through it all we find ourselves. I've tried so hard to be a 'Swanson' girl and I feel right at home here and love it here. But. I'm a Northern girl at heart and always will be. My roots are deep. And it's a good thing. It's strengthening.

So, with all the deep analyzing done (for now) I'll bid you good night.